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Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good?

Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good? Aam8e
Meanwhile, the advancement of technology is considered to be favorable for daily life by many factors. There is a common assertion that, progress of technology has brought more harm rather than goodApparently, technology have drawbacks for instance, scientist has found the advance radio signals generates radiations and is one of the factors to cause Cancer in human beings, those whose evolution into a more complex form has happened due to technology advancement. The evolution of smartphone has brought many benefits to people, to give an instance, have you ever faced navigation problems in an unfamiliar town? Yes, we all have faced such issues when we move to a new place. Be it a business or a vacation, modern technology allows you to enjoy your outings by helping you navigate to anywhere. One can search for a particular place and then even pinpoint their specific destination, by the way it saves your time. Furthermore it is fact that today's technology has replaced old technology. And we can't imagine our life without thi replacement. Instant messaging and sharing of photos and videos was never so easy before. On the other hand, it may bring harm to people if they use electronic devices too often and really depends on it. Social isolation is increasing due to personal computer technology such as smartphones and laptops. Both teens and youngsters spend more time on social media, internet surfing, playing video games and ignoring their real life. Moreover, if we give up all gadgets for at least some times, we will be amazed at how much time we will save. Saved time can be used in a useful activities, such as sport, kind of physical activities and in a education. To sum up, although technology has brought more harm than good, we would rather choose technology, because we can't imagine our life without it, or it has become indispensable in our life
Meanwhile, the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is considered
to be favorable for daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors. There is a common assertion that, progress of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has brought more harm
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
goodApparently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
have drawbacks
for instance
, scientist has found the advance radio signals generates radiations and is one of the factors to cause Cancer in human beings, those whose evolution into a more complex form has happened due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
advancement. The evolution of smartphone has brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, to give an instance, have you ever faced navigation problems in an unfamiliar town? Yes, we all have faced such issues when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to a new place. Be it a business or a vacation, modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
you to enjoy your outings by helping you navigate to anywhere. One can search for a particular place and then even pinpoint their specific destination, by the way it saves your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
it is fact that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has replaced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. And we can't imagine our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without
Possible spelling mistake found.
thi
replacement. Instant messaging and sharing of photos and videos was never
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
On the other hand
, it may bring harm to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
electronic devices too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
and
really
depends on it. Social isolation is increasing due to personal computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
such as smartphones and laptops. Both teens and youngsters spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on social media, internet surfing, playing video games and ignoring their real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Moreover
, if we give up all gadgets for at least
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
, we will
be amazed
at how much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
we will save. Saved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in a useful
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "activity"?
activities
, such as sport, kind of physical activities and in
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
education. To sum up, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has brought more harm than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, we would
rather
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we can't imagine our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without it, or it has become indispensable in our
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
life
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IELTS essay Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
315 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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