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do you think technology has benefits outweigh drawbacks

do you think technology has benefits outweigh drawbacks mLbwr
Nowadays, the improvement of technology has enabled people from all over the world to do unbelievable things. In my opinion, there are a number of benefits and also a few drawbacks, which it brings to our life. I will discuss both views in the following paragraphs. In the first place, technology gives people many opportunities to work wherever they live. During the Covid-19 pandemic, people cannot go to the company or school due to lockdown. However, they still working and studying effectively. For example, the Internet helps people communicate over vast distances and access useful information very quickly. Thanks to the development of technology, everything becomes easier and easier. Additionally, technology enables people to get in touch with others. Even though their relatives have been abroad, they can make a video call or audio call together. On the other hand, technology has a few disadvantages. During the online class, people are always distracted by using Facebook, playing video games and chatting. Moreover, people abuse the use of electronic devices, which leads to addiction. Consequently, their physical and mental health will be seriously affected. The excessive development of technology makes it easy for the bad guys dominate. They may steal information and do dangerous things. To sum up, according to my view, not only have technologies made our life more and more convenient but a few things also more worried. Therefore, people should learn about technology in order to use it for legitimate purposes and not abuse it too much.
Nowadays, the improvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has enabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all over the world to do unbelievable things. In my opinion, there are a number of benefits and
also
a few drawbacks, which it brings to our life. I will discuss both views in the following paragraphs.

In the
first
place,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
gives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opportunities to work wherever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. During the Covid-19 pandemic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot go to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
or school due to lockdown.
However
, they
still
working and studying
effectively
.
For example
, the Internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
communicate over vast distances and access useful information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
. Thanks to the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, everything becomes easier and easier.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with others.
Even though
their relatives have been abroad, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a video call or audio call together.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has a few disadvantages. During the online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are always distracted by using Facebook, playing video games and chatting.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
abuse the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of electronic devices, which leads to addiction.
Consequently
, their physical and mental health will be
seriously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
. The excessive development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it easy for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
guys dominate. They may steal information and do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
things.

To sum up, according to my view, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
made our life more and more convenient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a few things
also
more worried.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should learn about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for legitimate purposes and not abuse it too much.
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IELTS essay do you think technology has benefits outweigh drawbacks

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
249 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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