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Do you think more and more people choose to stay single is a positive trend?

Do you think more and more people choose to stay single is a positive trend? Wygjb
Nowadays, there is a rising trend for staying single among many people. In my opinion, such a tendency has more negative sides than positive ones because people need social interactions and more attention from others when getting older. First of all, social interactions are one of the vital parts of human life. Regardless of gender, even independent persons or asocial introverts need someone's presence as it creates the inner feeling of safety and calmness. Moreover, daily conversations and meetings with close ones increase the level of an essential hormone called oxytocin. For instance, scientific studies proved that people who lived alone tended to be more depressed and died, approximately, 10 years earlier than an average non-single person. Secondly, the presence of someone close is especially important when a person attains old age. Although some of the old people do not have health issues and can take care of themselves, the lion share of them cannot do even simple things without assistance. A prime example would be abandoned, old people. They have to go to special organizations where the necessary help is provided because some of them cannot even walk. At their age, there is a high risk of being injured while doing any kind of activity. In conclusion, staying alone, in my opinion, is a negative trend which can result in a great number of people suffering from depression. Also, at old age, most of them may need help because of problems with health. I would recommend staying away from virtual reality and focusing more on real interactions with others.
Nowadays, there is a rising trend for staying single among
many
people
. In my opinion, such a tendency has more
negative
sides than
positive
ones
because
people
need social interactions and more attention from others when getting older.

First of all
, social interactions are one of the vital parts of human life. Regardless of gender, even independent persons or asocial introverts need someone's presence as it creates the inner feeling of safety and calmness.
Moreover
, daily conversations and meetings with close
ones
increase the level of an essential hormone called oxytocin.
For instance
, scientific studies proved that
people
who
lived
alone tended to be more depressed and
died
, approximately, 10 years earlier than an average non-single person.

Secondly
, the presence of someone close is
especially
important
when a person attains
old
age. Although
some of the
old
people
do not have health issues and can take care of themselves, the lion share of them cannot do even simple things without assistance. A prime example would
be abandoned
,
old
people
. They
have to
go to special organizations where the necessary
help
is provided
because
some
of them cannot even walk. At their age, there is a high
risk
of
being injured
while doing any kind of activity.

In conclusion
, staying alone, in my opinion, is a
negative
trend which can result in a great number of
people
suffering from depression.
Also
, at
old
age, most of them may need
help
because
of problems with health. I would recommend staying away from virtual reality and focusing more on real interactions with others.
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IELTS essay Do you think more and more people choose to stay single is a positive trend?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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