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do you think it is a good idea to keep animals in zoos ?

do you think it is a good idea to keep animals in zoos? OEJlN
Nowadays, the number of zoos which are owned by government have been rising day by day. And individuals think keeping fauna members in menageries is a magnificent idea. Personally, I totally disagree with this view. To commence, it can be straightforwardly seen that every single animal in zoo is kept in an artificial environment which means animals cannot feel themselves as at home. The one reason for that is the scarcity of naturalness and the space limits. Admittedly, every animal - which was born in a forest or a jungle - knows that how the nature is tremendous and they will probably hate any restrictions, especially, space limits. For instance, in Tashkent there is a zoo where was full of animals. Conversely, now, the animals are few comparing to the last three decades. Another noticeable argument is that they have to rely solely on humans, specifically, with regard to próduce and health-care. In other words, they cannot hunt or feed theirselves due to the restrictions, furthermore, they just lose the opportunity to take care of their well-being. Thus, individuals - who took the responsibility - should feed their "friends" on time and also make a physical examination annually or monthly. Last but not least, people do not have any right to use fauna members as a tool of entertainment and profit. Notwithstanding the profit that comes from zoos, government cannot use animals just to make money and let them die. Definitely, law enforcement agency effortlessly can remain those animals, which dead, to younger and alive one, albeit it is unfair. To wind up, it was really daunting to come up with personal opinion. Nevertheless, I do disagree out of several arguments.
Nowadays, the number of zoos which are
owned
by
government
have been rising day by day. And individuals
think
keeping fauna members in menageries is a magnificent
idea
.
Personally
, I
totally
disagree with this view.

To commence, it can be
straightforwardly
seen
that every single
animal
in zoo is
kept
in an artificial environment which means
animals
cannot feel themselves as at home. The one reason for
that is
the scarcity of naturalness and the space limits.
Admittedly
, every
animal
-
which
was born
in a forest or a jungle
-
knows that how the nature is
tremendous and
they will
probably
hate any restrictions,
especially
, space limits.
For instance
, in Tashkent there is a zoo where was full of
animals
.
Conversely
,
now
, the
animals
are few comparing to the last three decades.

Another noticeable argument is that they
have to
rely
solely
on humans,
specifically
, with regard to
próduce
and health-care.
In other words
, they cannot hunt or feed
theirselves
due to the restrictions,
furthermore
, they
just
lose the opportunity to take care of their well-being.
Thus
, individuals
-
who took the responsibility
-
should feed their
"
friends
"
on time and
also
make
a physical examination
annually
or monthly.

Last
but
not least,
people
do not have any right to
use
fauna members as a tool of entertainment and profit. Notwithstanding the profit that
comes
from zoos,
government
cannot
use
animals
just
to
make
money and
let
them
die
. Definitely, law enforcement agency
effortlessly
can remain those
animals
, which dead, to younger and alive one, albeit it is unfair.

To wind up, it was
really
daunting to
come
up with personal opinion.
Nevertheless
, I do disagree out of several arguments.
What do you think?
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IELTS essay do you think it is a good idea to keep animals in zoos?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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