Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of older adults today and how can it be managed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of older adults today and how can it be managed? 0MBpQ
In contemporary culture, the elder people have been increasingly high and some people believe that is a problem to take care of them. That is not true and if some changes happen old adults will have a better life. In the following paragraphs, these changes will be discussed and solutions will be given to that problem. Society has evolved and the role of the family has changed through the years. Nowadays, both parents are working and the little time they have they dedicated to their children in order to grow them right, so the overaged individuals are seeking shelter in nursing homes, but with the increasing numbers a problem has been created. There are not spaces for more elders. With the purpose of resolving that issue, the government should build more nursing homes and offer work to more nurses, so overaged people can be treated right. Also, the children of the old individuals can employ workers to stay with their parents and help them with the everyday tasks. The only problem is that the elder people do not pay taxes so the government is not able to give enough money to the care system. So, immigrants that come to the country can be hired to treat helpless members of society and then more nursing homes can be built. Lastly, in my family, we have employed a young lady in order to live and help my grandmother that is unable to live alone. Also, my aunt and my father do not only help economically but also every now and then treat their mother at their best. In conclusion, a problem has appeared in our society and changes must be made to treat and help the elderly members. I believe that society will manage to treat everyone equally and give its best helath care to the old adults.
In contemporary culture, the elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have been
increasingly
high and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe
that is
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
to take care of them.
That is
not true and if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
happen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
adults will have a better life. In the following paragraphs, these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
will
be discussed
and solutions will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to that problem.

Society has evolved and the role of the family has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
through the years. Nowadays, both parents are working and the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
time they have they dedicated to their children in order to grow them right,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
overaged
individuals are seeking shelter in nursing homes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with the increasing numbers a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
has
been created
. There are not spaces for more elders. With the purpose of resolving that issue, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should build more nursing homes and offer work to more nurses,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Possible spelling mistake found.
overaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
be treated
right.
Also
, the children of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
individuals can employ workers to stay with their parents and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them with the everyday tasks.

The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is that the elder
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not pay taxes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is not able to give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to the care system.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, immigrants that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to the country can
be hired
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treat
helpless members of society and then more nursing homes can
be built
.
Lastly
, in my family, we have employed a young lady in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
my grandmother
that is
unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
alone.
Also
, my aunt and my father do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
economically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treat
their mother at their best.

In conclusion
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
has appeared in our society and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be made
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treat
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the elderly members. I believe that society will manage to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treat
everyone
equally
and give its best
Possible spelling mistake found.
helath
care to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
adults.

IELTS essay Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of older adults today and how can it be managed?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of older adults today and how can it be managed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.