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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is often not a good idea to move to a new city or anew country because you will lose old friends. v.775

It is often not a good idea to move to a new city or anew country because you will lose old friends. v. 775
Since the dawn of the civilization, human being waere migtaring, either by their choice or by the force of the circumstance. They usually faced several limitation on this long way of migration; they should to abandon their assets and freinds. So hard is to make a long lasting friendship that make it hard to choose to stay or leave. When it comes to this point, some controversies arise that weather it is not a good idea to move a new country or new city because of lost of old friends. Personally, I disagree with the statement. In following lines I will present and investigate two reasons to substantiate my response. The first reason is that life is an advanture chance that only is given to a person once. living in one place for whole life, convert people' s life to a boring life and rarely can it provide an excitement for them. But living in various places is more like and adventure; people can experience many new things and never do they life get boring. Also, they can make new friends and learn a lot from them, but in camparison people who live all of their life on a place, usually get depressed and in many cases associating with friends also can not help them. For instance, I myself studied my bachelor degree in a university far from my home town. Firts, I was very upset, but as the time went on, I found new friends and experienced many worthwile things. If I did not accept to withstand the first hardship of sepration from my friends, I would not be able to exprience such a good life. The second reason is that people can have a more wide community around them. With all the new technologies in this modern world, migration does not mean isolation. People can connect their friends easily by phone and video calls, and can share their experiences. They can invite their old friends, and they can have a larger community if they let their new and old friends become friends with each other. In comparison, People who do not migrate during their life, always have a limited number of friends around them. In the same example, since I had started my study in a new city, I have had more friends compared with my home town friends. In summary, having analyzed the preceding arguments and reasons, one can soon surmise that moving to a new city does not mean losing old friends. This is because not only can people do some adventures but also they may have a larger community of friends.
Since the dawn of the civilization, human being
Possible spelling mistake found.
waere
Possible spelling mistake found.
migtaring
, either by their choice or by the force of the circumstance. They
usually
faced several limitation on this long way of migration; they should to abandon their assets and
Possible spelling mistake found.
freinds
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
friendship that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to choose to stay or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to this point,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
controversies arise that weather it is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
country or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
Personally
, I disagree with the statement. In following lines I will present and investigate two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
to substantiate my response.

The
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is an
Possible spelling mistake found.
advanture
chance that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to a person once.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
living
in one place for whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, convert
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
to a boring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and rarely can it provide an excitement for them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
living in various places is more like and adventure;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things and never do they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
boring.
Also
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and learn a lot from them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
camparison
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
all of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
on a place,
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
depressed and in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases associating with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
also
can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them.
For instance
, I myself studied my bachelor degree in a university far from my home town.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Firts
, I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
upset,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
as the time went on, I found
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and experienced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
worthwile
things. If I did not accept to withstand the
first
hardship of
Possible spelling mistake found.
sepration
from my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, I would not be able to
Possible spelling mistake found.
exprience
such a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
life.

The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can have a more wide community around them. With all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technologies in this modern world, migration does not mean isolation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can connect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
easily
by phone and video calls, and can share their experiences. They can invite their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, and they can have a larger community if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with each other.
In comparison
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who do not migrate during their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, always have a limited number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
around them. In the same example, since I had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
my study in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
city, I have had more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
compared with my home town friends.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
summary, having analyzed the preceding arguments and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, one can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
surmise that moving to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
city does not mean losing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
adventures
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they may have a larger community of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
44Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay It is often not a good idea to move to a new city or anew country because you will lose old friends. v. 775

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
436 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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