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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.772

In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 772
By passing the years human necessities differ greatly. I believe that within next twenty years, humankind will use cars less. My arguments to this point are based on financially, technologically and professionally points. First, from a financially point of view, we can predict that next generation cars are well contruction. In other word, many complicated and rare materials will be used to produce a car. And these materials are so expensive. Consequently, cars' prices will drastically increase while its sells decrease. For instance, a machine company in japan wants to use a new malagma in its produced cars. This malagma is constructed from two expensive elements; gold and aluminium. Such cars are only for rich people. Second, from a technologically aspect, we see that every day new methods are invented to make transportation easier. For example, subways are spreading through all the cities and its costs are much cheaper for people. So, after a while, when all important places have access to common transportation, no one would not think about buying a car for commuting. Hence the number of sold cars will be decreased. Finally, by a quick glane at jobs and professions, we can understand that future careers will be done easily. I mean that you do not need to go to your office everyday, and you can do your duties while you are in your house. For instance consider a teacher, he should not go to the school and can easily use video conference to teach his students and it is right for students. By such a difference in career conditions no one may not to buy a car because he has not to go out. If all the above factors are considered, we can easily find out that when years pass human necessities to have own car decrease. So in future we will see less cars rather than now.
By passing the years human necessities differ
greatly
. I believe that within
next
twenty years, humankind will
use
cars
less. My arguments to this point
are based
on
financially
,
technologically
and
professionally
points.

First
, from a
financially point
of view, we can predict that
next
generation
cars
are well
contruction
. In other word,
many
complicated and rare materials will be
used
to produce a
car
. And these materials are
so
expensive.
Consequently
,
cars&
#039; prices will
drastically
increase while its sells decrease.
For instance
, a machine
company
in japan wants to
use
a new
malagma
in its produced
cars
. This
malagma
is constructed
from two expensive elements; gold and
aluminium
. Such
cars
are
only
for rich
people
.

Second, from a
technologically aspect
, we
see
that every day new methods
are invented
to
make
transportation easier.
For example
, subways are spreading through all the cities and its costs are much cheaper for
people
.
So
, after a while, when all
important
places have access to common transportation, no one would not
think
about buying a
car
for commuting.
Hence
the number of sold
cars
will
be decreased
.

Finally
, by a quick
glane
at jobs and professions, we can understand that future careers will
be done
easily
. I mean that you do not need to go to your office
everyday
, and you can do your duties while you are in your
house
.
For instance
consider a teacher, he should not go to the school and can
easily
use
video conference to teach his students and it is right for students. By such a difference in career conditions no one may not to
buy
a
car
because
he has not to go out.

If all the above factors
are considered
, we can
easily
find out that when years pass human necessities to have
own
car
decrease.
So
in future we will
see
less
cars
rather
than
now
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes

IELTS essay In twenty years, there will be fewer cars in use than there are today. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 772

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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