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do you agree or disagree with the following statement? there should be limitations on the outfit people wear to work and school. v.330

there should be limitations on the outfit people wear to work and school. v. 330
People have different views on how best to decrease the amount road traffic accidents. While some argue that strict punishments should be adopted, I believe that there are more effective ways to tackle this issue. There are several reasons why people believe that stricter punishments would ensure safety on our roads. They argue that road users and drivers would be discouraged from breaking traffic rules, with the knowledge that great punishments in the form of heavy fines and imprisonment awaits them when caught in the act. Secondly, it would be a source of revenue generation. By placing huge fines for certain offences such as over-speeding and traffic light violation, the state would gain financially and funds generated would be utilized in other sectors of the economy. On the other hand, several other methods are more effective in my opinion and would prevent accidents from occurring in the first place. Imposing punishments on offenders can be described as medicine after death, these disciplinary measures simply cannot bring back the lives that may have been lost or the health of victims of these unfortunate events. However, government can invest in improving the quality of roads, proper maintenance of these roads, building of pedestrian bridges and speed bumps while also investing on proper training of road workers. In conclusion, inasmuch as stringent disciplinary measures would be effective in cutting down the number of mishaps on our motorways. I believe that taking appropriate steps to prevent them in the first place would be the best approach.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views on how best to decrease the amount
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
traffic accidents. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
should
be adopted
, I believe that there are more effective ways to tackle this issue.

There are several reasons why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that stricter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
would ensure safety on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
. They argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
users and drivers would
be discouraged
from breaking traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
, with the knowledge that great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
in the form of heavy fines and imprisonment awaits them when caught in the act.
Secondly
, it would be a source of revenue generation. By placing huge fines for certain
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
such as over-speeding and traffic light violation, the state would gain
financially
and funds generated would
be utilized
in other sectors of the economy.

On the other hand
, several other methods are more effective in my opinion and would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
accidents from occurring in the
first
place. Imposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
on offenders can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
as medicine after death, these disciplinary measures
simply
cannot bring back the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
that may have
been lost
or the health of victims of these unfortunate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can invest in improving the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, proper maintenance of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, building of pedestrian bridges and speed bumps while
also
investing on proper training of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
workers.

In conclusion
, inasmuch as stringent disciplinary measures would be effective in cutting down the number of mishaps on our motorways. I believe that taking appropriate steps to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
them in the
first
place would be the best approach.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay there should be limitations on the outfit people wear to work and school. v. 330

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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