Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

do you agree or disagree? it is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are young than old. v.48

it is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are young than old. v. 48
Some people think that governments should promote other forms of transport such as metro trains and electric buses. In addition to that, international rules and regulations must be made to regulate the ownership of the vehicles and to put restrictions on the use of motorized vehicles in urban areas. I agree with this notion. This encouragement of modern transportation will reduce the health risks and new laws will curb the growth of upcoming cars on the roads. The promotion of alternative transport like metro trains will greatly reduce the pollution produced by conventional transportation such as cars and motorcycles. This is because, the traditional IC engines are less efficient and are the cause of hazardous pollution in the cities because they release their unburned fuel into the atmosphere, creating health risks for the residents of that city. Issues like these are absent in the metro trains which run purely on electricity, as well as carrying millions of passengers back and forth from their office to their homes safely and without releasing a single pollutant into the atmosphere. For example, trains in New York City can carry 10, 000 passengers on a single trip and can travel at a speed, far superior to their traditional counterparts, and that even without burning low-quality fuel, saving huge amounts of carbon going into the atmosphere. Besides this, the introduction of new international rules will help in restricting the growth of upcoming cars on the roads by managing the ownership of the vehicles. Although this control will restrict the personal freedom of the choice, however, it is essential to keep the cities from choking. In China, For example, a family is allowed to have only one car for their personal use and if they want to have another vehicle, they have to explain to the authorities about how the second car is essential for their daily commute and that even takes years before they get permits to buy a second car. These measures can help to prevent traffic jams in urban areas and can provide more freedom for pedestrians to safely commute around the cities. In conclusion, the promotion of alternative transportation is necessary to lower the pollution caused by the thousands of vehicles on the road. I believe that the introduction of a new set of international laws to discourage ownership of the car and restricting these vehicles entering the urban centers will provide freedom to pedestrians and reduce traffic congestions.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should promote other forms of transport such as metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and electric buses.
In addition
to that, international
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be made
to regulate the ownership of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
and to put restrictions on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of motorized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
in urban areas. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this notion. This encouragement of modern transportation will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
laws will curb the growth of upcoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
on the roads.

The promotion of alternative transport like metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
will
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the pollution produced by conventional transportation such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and motorcycles. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, the traditional
Possible spelling mistake found.
IC
engines are less efficient and are the cause of hazardous pollution in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they release their unburned fuel into the atmosphere, creating health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
for the residents of that city. Issues like these are absent in the metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
which run
purely
on electricity,
as well
as carrying millions of passengers back and forth from their office to their homes
safely
and without releasing a single pollutant into the atmosphere.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
York City can carry 10, 000 passengers on a single trip and can travel at a speed, far superior to their traditional counterparts, and that even without burning low-quality fuel, saving huge amounts of carbon going into the atmosphere.

Besides
this, the introduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
international
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in restricting the growth of upcoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
on the roads by managing the ownership of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
. Although this control will restrict the personal freedom of the choice,
however
, it is essential to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
from choking. In China,
For example
, a family is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
for their personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and if they want to have another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicle
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
to the authorities about how the second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is essential for their daily commute and that even takes years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
permits to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
. These measures can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
traffic jams in urban areas and can provide more freedom for pedestrians to
safely
commute around the cities.

In conclusion
, the promotion of alternative transportation is necessary to lower the pollution caused by the thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the road. I believe that the introduction of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
set of international laws to discourage ownership of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
and restricting these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
entering the urban centers will provide freedom to pedestrians and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
traffic congestions.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay it is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are young than old. v. 48

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
407 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts