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do you agree or disagre with this statement? printed material will be soon replaced by internet sources v.2

printed material will be soon replaced by internet sources v. 2
It is a highly debated issue whether or not printed material will soon be completely replaced by internet source, and this topic can be approached from several angles due to its complexity. While some people tend to think it is possible to replace the printed material with internet in the future, others seem to disagree with them. Deeply deliberating over the issue, I believe that the printed material will continue to exist in our future and the following discussion reveals my stand and reasoning. To begin with, there are a huge amount of printed material nowadays, I don’t think we could convert it to internet sources. When you go to any library, you would find thousands of books in its shelf; these books need so many years to be converted to an internet source. For example, few years ago, when I was in the college, I used to go to the library to get my resources for any research that I did at that time. The library in our campus, has ten stories, each story has thousands of books and printed material. I even used some resources that has been written 15 years ago. I don’t believe that we could replace them in the near future at all. This is only in one library of thousands of libraries around the world. As you could see, even if the technology get advanced, there are so many printed material to be replaced by internet sources, so, it is almost an impossible task. Second, printed material is more trustworthy than the internet. When you buy a book, you will see the name of the Author, the publisher, and the references all included in the book. You can’t necessarily find these names on internet source. For instance, I remember when I did my graduation research few years ago, it was about one new hypertension medicine. I was searching the internet for information, but most of the information that I found was part of the books that I already have, and other information was so wrong; I even couldn’t reach to their sources or references. From my personal experience I could say that printed material will continue to be exist in the future because people could trust them more than the internet. In conclusion, I believe that printed material won’t be replace by internet sources in the future. Not only are there huge amount of books and printed resources, but also because printed material are more trustworthy than the internet now and in the future. That’s why people should not minimize their importance even if the technology get more advanced and the internet become in wide use.
It is a
highly
debated issue
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
be completely replaced by internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
, and this topic can
be approached
from several angles due to its complexity. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is possible to replace the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
with internet in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, others seem to disagree with them.
Deeply
deliberating over the issue, I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
will continue to exist in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
and the following discussion reveals my stand and reasoning.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are a huge
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "amounts"?
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
nowadays, I don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we could convert it to internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
. When you go to any library, you would find thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in its shelf; these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years to
be converted
to an internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
.
For example
, few years ago, when I was in the college, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to go to the library to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
my resources for any research that I did at that time. The library in our campus, has ten stories, each story has thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
. I even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
resources that has
been written
15 years ago. I don’t believe that we could replace them in the near
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
at all. This is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in one library of thousands of libraries around the world. As you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, even if the technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
advanced, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
to
be replaced
by internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, it is almost an impossible task.

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
is more trustworthy than the internet. When you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
, you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the name of the Author, the publisher, and the references all included in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
. You can’t
necessarily
find these names on internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
.
For instance
, I remember when I did my graduation research few years ago, it was about one new hypertension medicine. I was searching the internet for information,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most of the information that I found was part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
that I already have, and other information was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
; I even couldn’t reach to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
or references. From my personal experience I could say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
will continue to be
Consider using a past participle here: "existed".
exist
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
could trust them more than the internet.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
won’t be
Consider using a past participle here: "replaced".
replace
by internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
are there huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
resources,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
material
are more trustworthy than the internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. That’s why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should not minimize their importance even if the technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more advanced and the internet become in wide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
41Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay printed material will be soon replaced by internet sources v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
442 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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