Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Do the advantages of living in a busy city outweigh the disavantages?

Do the advantages of living in a busy city outweigh the disavantages? m8wEq
In the recent years, there is an irrefutable fact that abundance of people are more fond of staying in such urban areas in order to improve their individual lives. Although this phenomenon might have some positive aspects, I am inclined to believe that its demerits are far more than its merits. On the one hand, it is conspicuous that settling in enormous city has several noteworthy benefits. First and foremost, it is undeniable that the citizens would receive more superior occupation chances as well as a higher salary. In other words, since the establishment of more and more large companies and industries, it has offered the dweller the opportunities to work for them. Consequently, the society will be significantly ameliorated and the unemployment rate is likely to remain low. Additionally, people who reside in huge cities will be beneficial from such state-of-the-art infrastructures and facilities. It means that they are capable of experiencing the advanced hotels or luxurious restaurants with the most convenient services. This results in the enjoyment and relaxation for the citizens after a hard working day. Nevertheless, I argue that the drawbacks of this type of living would prove to be worldwide. In fact, it is concerned that factories, industries and means of transport such as motorbikes are emitting a great deal of toxic fumes into the atmosphere which sharply increase greenhouse effect. For instance, the demand for utilising mortobikes to travel to work has encouraged dwellers to use them day by day. As a result, this will have considerable influences on both individuals' physical and mental health. What is more, a number of people here will have a tendency to commit crimes due to the substantial gap between the rich and the people who live below the poverty line. In particular, some citizens being unemployed or beggars will have intention of stealing or even robbing the bank and killing inocent people. To sum up, there are plus points to staying in such massive cities. However, it seems to me that its negative aspects would be more vital regarding its dramatically poisonous atmosphere as well as remaining highly of crime rates.
In the recent years, there is an irrefutable fact that abundance of
people
are more fond of staying in such urban areas in order to
improve
their individual
lives
. Although this phenomenon might have
some
positive
aspects, I
am inclined
to believe that its demerits are far more than its merits.

On the one hand, it is conspicuous that settling in enormous city has several noteworthy benefits.
First
and foremost, it is undeniable that the citizens would receive more superior occupation chances
as well
as a higher salary.
In other words
, since the establishment of more and more large
companies
and industries, it has offered the dweller the opportunities to work for them.
Consequently
, the society will be
significantly
ameliorated and the unemployment rate is likely to remain low.
Additionally
,
people
who reside in huge cities will be beneficial from such state-of-the-art infrastructures and facilities. It means that they are capable of experiencing the advanced hotels or luxurious restaurants with the most convenient services. This results in the enjoyment and relaxation for the citizens after a
hard working
day.

Nevertheless
, I argue that the drawbacks of this type of living would prove to be worldwide. In fact, it
is concerned
that factories, industries and means of transport such as motorbikes are emitting a great deal of toxic fumes into the atmosphere which
sharply
increase greenhouse effect.
For instance
, the demand for
utilising
mortobikes
to travel to work has encouraged dwellers to
use
them day by day.
As a result
, this will have considerable influences on both individuals' physical and mental health.
What is more
, a number of
people
here will have a tendency to commit crimes due to the substantial gap between the rich and the
people
who
live
below the poverty line.
In particular
,
some
citizens
being unemployed
or beggars will have intention of stealing or even robbing the bank and killing
inocent
people
.

To sum up, there are plus points to staying in such massive cities.
However
, it seems to me that its
negative
aspects would be more vital regarding its
dramatically
poisonous atmosphere
as well
as remaining
highly
of crime rates.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Do the advantages of living in a busy city outweigh the disavantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 5.5band
    Write a paragraph about the advantages of play e-sports
    In this modern world, the development of the e-sports industry has been rising so dramatically, and playing esports bring numerous advantages to the players. But first, to clarify esports is distinguished from ordinary gameplay because of its tactics, multi-players, cooperation between players as we...
  • 5.5band
    same sex is accepted in America
    Same-sex marriage is the term that leads to a host of arguments when it is mentioned. In the world, same-sex marriage is considered a sensitive issue in many countries; however, in others, it is not. America is among them. The marriage between two same-sex people was legally recognized in 50 states ...
  • 5band
    SUGGEST AN ADVANCED SOFTWARE FOR BANKING TO YOUR MANAGER
    I WRITE TO EXPRESS MY EXCITEMENT ABOUT AN IDEA THAT COULD REVOLUTIONALISE THE BANKING SYSTEM. IT IS A SOFTWARE THAT FUNCTIONS AROUND THE CONCEPT OF FILE MANAGEMENT SYSTEM, AND IS EFFICIENT ENOUGH TO TACKLE THE WORKLOAD OF MILLIONS OF CUSTOMERS IN A SECURE MANNER. I WRITE TO CHECK IF YOU WOULD HAVE T...
  • 5band
    LETTER TO A THEATRE MANAGER ABOUT A LOST JACKET
    I WRITE TO EXPRESS MY CONCERN ABOUT A JACKET THAT I ACCIDENTLY LEFT BEHIND AT YOUR THEATRE LAST TUESDAY. IT IS AN EXPENSIVE JACKET, AND HAS MY WALLET ALONG WITH A FEW OTHER THINGS IN IT. I WRITE TO CHECK IF YOU CAN HELP ME LOCATE THE JACKET, AND ARRANGE FOR IT TO BE SENT TO MY ADDRESS. I WAS AT YOU...
  • 5band
    Think of a person you consider a role model. Why did you choose this person?
    Every people have a person who encourages them to set goals in their life. Such as: one of their parents, brothers, sisters or another person. I have a person that always motivates me. She is my mother. She is a really kind, even-tempered, patient, simpering person. She has never regret her life and...
  • 5band
    Describe (a) something that you achieved as a result of committing yourself over an extended period of time and (b) something that you aspire to achieve in the future.
    Life is a series of decisions and each decision will lead you to an unexpected way of your life. Honestly, we can't choose where we are born but we can choose our life and I choose to have a remorseless life. I was born in an ordinary family with unnoticeable background and when I was in grade 5, I...