Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Do the advantages of government speding their money on college and university fees for students outweigh the disadvantages?

Do the advantages of government speding their money on college and university fees for students outweigh the disadvantages? d3R8r
It is true that education should be the government’s priority to train future generaions contributing to the nation. Although this may have some disadvantages, I believe that the benefits are greater than the negative effects. On the one hand, the sponsorship for students studying college or university of the government is harmful in some ways. The first prominent justification is that free university education will need a dramatic increase in the tax lead to more burden for the taxpayers. Following this, there are may have the disagreements from citizens to this policy affecting the trust the put on government. More importantly, the increasing number of college graduates will result in intense competition in the job market. For instance, the number of people with higher education are increase while the occupations are not change will lead to the situation of not being able to find a job or having to work in a job that is not suitable for the education level. On the other hand, I would argue that these drawbacks are outweighed by the benefits. Firstly, funding education is like investing for the future success of a nation due to they are the future workforce playing a key role in contributing nation. In addition, people with university education are more likely to pay higher income tax to the government their well-paid salary. Last but not least, the cost of attending universities is so expensive for the poor yet talented students. To specify, Vietnam is a country with many ethnic minorities who live in the suburbs, make a living by manual jobs and do not have ability to send their children to school. In conclusion, for the reasons mentioned above, it is obvious to acknowledge the dominant benefits of this trend, but the possible drawbacks of the government’s funding on university should be not overlooked.
It is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
priority to train future
Possible spelling mistake found.
generaions
contributing to the nation. Although this may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages, I believe that the benefits are greater than the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.

On the one hand, the sponsorship for students studying college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is harmful in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ways. The
first
prominent justification is that free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
will need a dramatic increase in the tax lead to more burden for the taxpayers. Following this, there are may have the disagreements from citizens to this policy affecting the trust the put on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. More
importantly
, the increasing number of college graduates will result in intense competition in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
market.
For instance
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
are increase while the occupations are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
will lead to the situation of not being able to find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
or having to work in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that is
not suitable for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
level.

On the other hand
, I would argue that these drawbacks
are outweighed
by the benefits.
Firstly
, funding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is like investing for the future success of a nation due to they are the future workforce playing a key role in contributing nation.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
are more likely to pay higher income tax to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
their well-paid salary. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the cost of attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
expensive for the poor
yet
talented students. To specify, Vietnam is a country with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ethnic minorities who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the suburbs,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a living by manual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and do not have ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their children to school.

In conclusion
, for the reasons mentioned above, it is obvious to acknowledge the dominant benefits of this trend,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the possible drawbacks of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
funding on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
should be not overlooked.

IELTS essay Do the advantages of government speding their money on college and university fees for students outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Do the advantages of government speding their money on college and university fees for students outweigh the disadvantages?