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Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of travel

Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of travel AP8Rn
In recent times, there has been strong growth in travel. Although this trend brings many benefits, it also has some negative effects that need to be considered. On the one hand, there are some reasons why travelling become beneficial. Firstly, with traveling, we will have the chaces to come across a lot of amazing people. Therefore, we can improve our communication skill and it will also improve our personality in almost every way. Besides, travelling lets we explore some new places that we have always dreamt about to improve the knowledge about other cultures and traditions which we have never known before. On the contrary, traveling has disadvantages too. One of the major disadvantages of traveling is the costs involved. Traveling is expensive and involves the use of money such as food, entertainment, and accommodation that many people cannot afford. Futhermore, travelling can lead to fall ill and maybe then to expensive treatment or in case of fatal accident like for instance car and plane one to death of many people. The next disadvantage is fatigue that occur while travelling. Most journeys last very long, and it can make us feel exhausted. In conclusion, the disadvantages of traveling certainly do not outweigh the advantages. Even so, the downsides cannot be overlooked but for having solutions for it
In recent times, there has been strong growth in travel. Although this trend brings
many
benefits, it
also
has
some
negative
effects that need to
be considered
. On the one hand, there are
some
reasons why
travelling
become beneficial.
Firstly
, with traveling, we will have the
chaces
to
come
across
a lot of
amazing
people
.
Therefore
, we can
improve
our communication
skill
and it will
also
improve
our personality in almost every way.
Besides
,
travelling
lets
we explore
some
new places that we have always dreamt about to
improve
the knowledge about other cultures and traditions which we have never known
before
.
On the contrary
, traveling has disadvantages too. One of the major disadvantages of traveling is the costs involved. Traveling is expensive and involves the
use
of money such as food, entertainment, and accommodation that
many
people
cannot afford.
Futhermore
,
travelling
can lead to fall ill and maybe then to expensive treatment or in case of fatal accident like
for instance
car and
plane
one to death of
many
people
. The
next
disadvantage
is fatigue that occur while
travelling
. Most journeys last
very
long, and it can
make
us feel exhausted.
In conclusion
, the disadvantages of traveling
certainly
do not outweigh the advantages. Even
so
, the downsides cannot
be overlooked
but
for having solutions for
it
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IELTS essay Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of travel

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
216 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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