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different kinds of jobs in your country.

different kinds of jobs in your country. nNN1K
With the rapidly development of science technology in my country as well as 4. 0 technology, there are so many new jobs. Two common kinds of jobs in my country is low-paid jobs and high-paid jobs. Low-paid jobs are the job that people get less salary. As usual, the environment for people who do a low-paid job is less safe and comfortable than environment for people who do the other one. For example, a road cleaner often works on the road and has to stand the hard environment like hotness or rain. . . Low-paid jobs mostly do not require people with diploma, even age limitation. For instance, safeguard or sale assistant in some convenience stores, they are form 18 to even 60. I had ever seen a 65-year-old safeguard. High-paid jobs often require more such as diploma, certificate or experience. Getting a master will help you to find a well-paid job more easily than getting no diploma or certificate. Moreover, you can not work without practical skills such as computering, foreign language or communication skill…More useful you are, more salary you get. In addition, working environment is much better. You can work in a modern office with high-technology equipment. Or you will have a lot of benefits in many aspects such as: health, entertainment… In conclusion, my country has two kinds of jobs and they has some differents. Both of them contribute a lot in my country. No one can deny the importance of them. In the future, there will be so many new jobs but they still devide in two kinds of jobs: low-paid jobs and high-paid jobs.
With the
rapidly
development of science technology in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as well
as 4. 0 technology, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. Two common kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and high-paid jobs.

Low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
less salary. As usual, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do a low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is less safe and comfortable than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do the other one.
For example
, a road cleaner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
works on the road and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
stand the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
like hotness or rain.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
mostly
do not require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with diploma, even age limitation.
For instance
, safeguard or sale assistant in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
convenience stores, they are form 18 to even 60. I had ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a 65-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
safeguard.

High-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
require more such as diploma, certificate or experience. Getting a master will
In informal texts, 'to' is not necessary. Do you mean "help you find"?
help you to find
a well-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
more
easily
than getting no diploma or certificate.
Moreover
, you can not work without practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
computering
, foreign language or communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
…
Add a space between sentences
More
useful you are, more salary you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
.
In addition
, working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is much better. You can work in a modern office with high-technology equipment. Or you will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects such as: health, entertainment…

In conclusion
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has two kinds of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jobs and
they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "have", "haven"
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
differents
. Both of them contribute a lot in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. No one can deny the importance of them. In the future, there will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
still
Possible spelling mistake found.
devide
in two kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
: low-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and high-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
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IELTS essay different kinds of jobs in your country.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
270 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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