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Describe your experience as game developer.

Describe your experience as game developer. BAJm
Well, as all of my schooling was completed in the field of computer science. I was fully sure about my education and career from the beginning that i would pursue my all education in computer science. Consequently, it was clear to me that i have to worked as developer. When, i was graduated from my university, immediately, i started to find a job in my field. So, i applied i many companies as well as i told to my friend that i am looking for a job. After a couple of days i found a job with the reference of my friend. Basically, it was a job at gaming house to work as game developer. I started to work in this field as game developer. Before this gaming field was new to me. Although, i had played a lot of games in my childhood. But, it was unfamiliar to me how to makes games. It is quite natural phenomena when we jump into a unfamiliar field of work slowy and steadily we start learning about those things. After a couple of months, i was able to create a new game. This is how was i started my career as game developer and now i have more than two years of experience of this field.
Well, as all of my schooling
was completed
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
of computer science. I was
fully
sure about my education and career from the beginning that
Did you mean "I"?
i
would pursue my all education in computer science.
Consequently
, it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
to me that
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worked as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developer
. When,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
was graduated
from my university, immediately,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
applied i
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
as well
as
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
to my friend that
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am looking for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
a couple of days
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
found a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
with the reference of my friend.
Basically
, it was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
at gaming
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
to work as game
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developer
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to work in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
as game
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developer
.
“Before” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Before
this gaming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
was new to me.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
had played
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
in my childhood.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, it was unfamiliar to me how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. It is quite natural phenomena when we jump into
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
unfamiliar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
of work
Possible spelling mistake found.
slowy
and
steadily
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
learning about those things. After a couple of months,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
was able to create a new game. This is how was
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
my career as game
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developer
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
have more than two years of experience of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
field
.
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IELTS essay Describe your experience as game developer.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
214 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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