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Describe the woman is keen on applying for the research program although it is not compulsory in her field of study? v.1

Describe the woman is keen on applying for the research program although it is not compulsory in her field of study? v. 1
In general, many parents considerate to send their children to a bilingual institution for learning the second language. The reason is some experts said it is a key learning period for primary students. I agree with the concept and suggestion. Younger learners have a better capacity to learn the extra tongue while learning from their mother. However, there are many subjects for under secondary classes. It can be too much pressure for them to try to keep up a new speech. On the contrary, they are much earlier absorbing new knowledge rather than older learners. I believe it is true of physical brain developing. When we see a child mimic their mother and father speak, it is less effort to remember. Once a child memorised the words, it is very hard to forget. In my opinion, I would have learnt English when I was in the primary course If I could. Because it is a great learning phase for a kid. Whereas there are already many pressures from other subjects, such as math or Chinese lessons to study, but it would not be harder than a senior. For instance, when I was in high school, I have to spend twice of time to recognize a new word that I have had learnt. In conclusion, although getting a foreign language during childhood can be intimidating for primary school learners. But if balanced the classes with a new subject, minimize the weight of lesson, design a course for junior study and facilitate their interest, it will be not difficult for studying and can be a better outcome rather than adolescents.
In general
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parents considerate to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their children to a bilingual institution for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
the second language. The reason is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experts said it is a key
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
period for primary students. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the concept and suggestion. Younger learners have a better capacity to learn the extra tongue while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
from their mother.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
subjects for under secondary classes. It can be too much pressure for them to try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
speech.
On the contrary
, they are much earlier absorbing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
knowledge
rather
than older learners. I believe it is true of physical brain developing. When we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a child mimic their mother and father speak, it is less effort to remember. Once a child
Possible spelling mistake. 'memorised' is British English.
memorised
the words, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to forget.

In my opinion, I would have
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
English when I was in the primary course If I could.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
it is a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
phase for a kid. Whereas there are already
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
pressures from other subjects, such as math or Chinese lessons to study,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would not be harder than a senior.
For instance
, when I was in high school, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend twice of time to recognize a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
word that I have had
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
.

In conclusion
, although getting a foreign language during childhood can be intimidating for primary school learners.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if balanced the classes with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
subject, minimize the weight of lesson, design a course for junior study and facilitate their interest, it will be not difficult for studying and can be a better outcome
rather
than adolescents.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Describe the woman is keen on applying for the research program although it is not compulsory in her field of study? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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