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Describe a time when you had to overcome a problem in a creative way

Describe a time when you had to overcome a problem in a creative way NVd2m
Since my childhood, I've had a huge interest in being a teacher, because I was born and raised in a family full of teachers. Then, as I have a talent to learn languages in a short time, I wanted to share these techniques with others. After having entered the University, I had some spare time at the weekends. One day I was talking with my english tutor when he offered me a job as an assistant. After that, I took that volunteering job with pleasure. I started teaching mainly 14 year olds. All of my students were making a huge progress and they always loved the colourful presentations and group games that I usually organized. However, there was a boy Sarvar who didn't do his homework on time. Then, one day when I called his mother to ask about the reason, she started complaining about her son playing a game "PUBG" on his phone and she couldn't find a way to stop him. Even staying at home whole day and playing that game affected his health profoundly. The next day when the lesson was over, I asked Sarvar to wait a little. Then, I told him that if he could win the first place in a game Duolingo which is the best platform for language learners, I would give him a special gift. Hearing these words, he wanted to take that challenge. Immidiately, I started observing him in order to decide what gift to buy. After 2 days when I was going out of the study centre, he opened the door and all of a sudden, fell his notebooks and books. I saw the photos of a ball and Ronaldo on his every notebook when I was helping him to take them up. Then, I came up with a great idea which was buying a ball as his gift. After a week, he came and told me that he won the game. I praised him and gave him his gift which sparkled his eyes and he looked blisfully happy. After my gift, he started playing football that improved his health. Plus, he started doing all the homework and reduced the PUBG-time. His parents were also grateful for what I did.
Since my childhood, I've had a huge interest in being a teacher,
because
I
was born
and raised in a family full of teachers. Then, as I have a talent to learn languages in a short time, I wanted to share these techniques with others. After having entered the University, I had
some
spare time at the weekends. One day I was talking with my
english
tutor when he offered me a job as an assistant. After that, I took that volunteering job with pleasure.

I
started
teaching
mainly
14 year olds
. All of my students were making a huge
progress and
they always
loved
the
colourful
presentations and group
games
that I
usually
organized.
However
, there was a boy
Sarvar
who didn't do his homework on time. Then, one day when I called his mother to ask about the reason, she
started
complaining about her son playing a game
"
PUBG
"
on his
phone and
she couldn't find a way to
stop
him. Even staying at home whole day and playing that game
affected
his health
profoundly
.

The
next
day when the lesson was over, I asked
Sarvar
to wait a
little
. Then, I
told
him that if he could win the
first
place in a game Duolingo which is the best platform for language learners, I would give him a special
gift
. Hearing these words, he wanted to take that challenge.
Immidiately
, I
started
observing him in order to decide what
gift
to
buy
. After 2 days when I was going out of the study
centre
, he opened the door and all of a sudden, fell his notebooks and books. I
saw
the photos of a ball and Ronaldo on his every notebook when I was helping him to take them up.

Then, I came up with a great
idea
which was buying a ball as his
gift
. After a week, he came and
told
me that he won the game. I praised him and gave him his
gift
which sparkled his
eyes and
he looked
blisfully
happy. After my
gift
, he
started
playing football that
improved
his health. Plus, he
started
doing all the homework and
reduced
the PUBG-time. His parents were
also
grateful for what I did.
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IELTS essay Describe a time when you had to overcome a problem in a creative way

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
370 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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