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An answer to a message of my friend about an au pair.

An answer to a message of my friend about an au pair. m2Ea8
Carl is one of my best friends. He is 19 years old. He could not enter a university this year becauce of the financial problems. So, I think he would love to have a job in the UK. His parents are retired. Carl has a sister and a little brother. he often babysits his brother, so he has an experience in that work. Carl is an independent, reliable and sociable boy. everything that a 19 year old boy needs. He is also very sensible. At first, he might seem a bit quiet but once he gets to know you he will be really talkative. I am sure you will never be bored with him. he is good with children because he is incredibly sympathetic. In his spare time he loves to play football. And I should admit that he is quite good in it. So I think he can teach some football tricks to Mike. The only problem with Carl is that he is a bit jealous. He seems a bit angry even when his friends talk to a stranger more than nessesary. Also, his english is quite bad, but I think he will improve very quickly. Anyway, he is a really good guy. I think you will love him.
Carl is one of my best friends. He is 19 years
old
. He could not enter a university this year
becauce
of the financial problems.
So
, I
think
he would
love
to have a job in the UK. His parents
are retired
. Carl has a sister and a
little
brother.
he
often
babysits his brother,
so
he has an experience in that work. Carl is an independent, reliable and sociable boy.
everything
that a 19 year
old
boy needs. He is
also
very
sensible. At
first
, he might seem a bit quiet
but
once he
gets
to know you he will be
really
talkative. I am sure you will never
be bored
with him.
he
is
good
with children
because
he is
incredibly
sympathetic. In his spare time he
loves
to play football. And I should admit that he is quite
good
in it.
So
I
think
he can teach
some
football tricks to Mike. The
only
problem with Carl is that he is a bit jealous. He seems a bit angry even when his friends talk to a stranger more than
nessesary
.
Also
, his
english
is quite
bad
,
but
I
think
he will
improve
very
quickly
. Anyway, he is a
really
good
guy. I
think
you will
love
him.
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IELTS essay An answer to a message of my friend about an au pair.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
210 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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