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Describe a time when you had a weight in a long line

Describe a time when you had a weight in a long line KGl69
Well, waiting in long lines is pretty usual in India. I do not think there were any person who had wait in long lines for long hours. But it happen to me quite a lot of times and today I would like to describe a recent experience when I waiting in line to update my Aadhar card number. if I was not drop it was the happen about six months ago when I was noticed by my college to updated my aadhar card ID with updated mobile number unfortunately I my mobile number has changed so I decided to get it to the government office which far away from my town and when I reach there aisa a long line of people approximately people 200 plus in the long line it was urgent work but line was too long therefore I had no other option other than waiting in mitron and I waited for 3 hours on that dayduring this time I felt hungry and tired but finally when I got done my work. I thanks to God giving me patient for waiting such as a long time.
Well,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waiting
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
is pretty usual in India. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there were any person who had wait in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lines
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
hours.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it
Did you mean "happens"?
happen
to me quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
times and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
a recent experience when I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waiting
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
to update my
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aadhar
card number.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
if
I was not drop it was
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'happen' is correct. If 'happen' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the happen
about six months ago when I
was noticed
by my college to updated my
Possible spelling mistake found.
aadhar
card ID with updated mobile number unfortunately I my mobile number has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
office which far away from my town and when I reach there
Possible spelling mistake found.
aisa
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
approximately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
200 plus in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
it was urgent work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
was too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
therefore
I had no other option other than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waiting
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
mitron
and I waited for 3 hours on that
Possible spelling mistake found.
dayduring
this time I felt hungry and tired
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
finally
when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
done my work. I
The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "thank"
thanks
to God giving me patient for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waiting
such as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
time.
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IELTS essay Describe a time when you had a weight in a long line

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
188 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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