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Describe a tech device that you own

Speaking of how I got it, well I suppose it was one year back when I was in grade 12. At that time, I had to study hard to win a place at university. So, after I was done with all that, my sister decided to reward me for all the hard work. She got me the latest IPhone. In terms of the price, I have no idea about the precise price, yet I guess the range is between 1000$ and 1200$. I have to say that its design is very sleek and the interface is user friendly Speaking of usage, I use it for a brunch of purposes, such as snapping photos, recording videos, and suffering on the Internet as well. On top of this, my phone is water-resistant so I can take photos when it’s pouring, which is super handy. I also use it for work purposes such as creating and editing documents and preparing presentations. I can go on and on about its functions, but i don’t wanna bore you with the details. My life wouldn’t be so convenient if it wasn’t for this phone. It’s great value for money. I’m definitely going to buy the next model when it’s released, that’s why I’m saving up right now. I guess that’s pretty much it.
Speaking of how I
got
it, well I suppose it was one year back when I was in grade 12. At that time, I had to study
hard
to win a place at university.
So
, after I
was done
with all that, my sister decided to reward me for all the
hard
work. She
got
me the latest
IPhone
.

In terms of the price, I have no
idea
about the precise price,
yet
I guess the range is between
1000$
and
1200$
.

I
have to
say that its design is
very
sleek and the interface is
user friendly


Speaking of usage, I
use
it for a brunch of purposes, such as snapping photos, recording videos, and suffering on the Internet
as well
. On top of this, my phone is water-resistant
so
I can take photos when it’s pouring, which is super handy. I
also
use
it for work purposes such as creating and editing documents and preparing presentations.

I can go on and on about its functions,
but
i
don’t
wanna
bore you with the
details
.

My life wouldn’t be
so
convenient if it wasn’t for this phone. It’s great value for money. I’m definitely going to
buy
the
next
model when it’s released, that’s why I’m saving up right
now
.

I guess that’s pretty much it.
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IELTS essay Describe a tech device that you own

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
217 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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