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Describe a hotel you stayed at Name and location of the hotel where an when you went Facilities offered by the hotel management v.1

Describe a hotel you stayed at Name and location of the hotel where an when you went Facilities offered by the hotel management v. 1
Nowadays, due to the introduction of modern culture, people are losing interest in their own culture. Personally, I feel that one should wear clothes which are comfortable, but must not forget their traditional attires. This essay will discuss how it is necessary to adopt new environment while sticking to your roots. Firstly, People from new generation are wearing similar clothes because of globalization. They go to different places like colleges and offices where people from different cultures are working with them. To maintain uniformity, they have to wear clothes similar to everyone. For example, some multinational corporations have a dress code policy which everyone has to follow. This creates unity in the employees. This, also, avoids religion based conflict. Today, people feel more confident in global fashioned clothes. They wear clothes which are comfortable. Due to their fast moving life, they prefer outfits which are easy to wear. On the other side, some people feel that it is necessary to follow the fashion trend because of the peer pressure. As per the old saying – “When in the Rome, do as the Romans do” one should adopt the changing surroundings to be in the race. Secondly, just to mould with the environment, one must not forget their roots. They should wear their traditional attires whenever possible. Some people think that wearing clothes related to their culture makes them look old fashioned. Youngster feels that this will affect their public image. Some of them are not even aware of their traditions. Hence creating awareness is the need. For instance, parents should wear traditional clothes more often. This will give education to their children about their customs. In addition to this, employers should motivate their workers to wear traditional clothes, at least once in the year. In the conclusion, it is true that modernization has affected cultures adversely. This essay discussed that it is necessary to adopt vicinity and blend in it. But it is also mandatory to keep up with your long established traditions.
Nowadays, due to the introduction of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are losing interest in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
Personally
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
that one should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
which are comfortable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not forget their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
attires. This essay will discuss how it is necessary to adopt new environment while sticking to your roots.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
from new generation are wearing similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of globalization. They go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places like colleges and offices where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
are working with them. To maintain uniformity, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
similar to everyone.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
multinational corporations have a dress code policy which everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
follow. This creates unity in the employees. This,
also
, avoids religion based conflict.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
more confident in global fashioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
which are comfortable. Due to their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
moving life, they prefer outfits which are easy to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
. On the other side,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
that it is necessary to follow the fashion trend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the peer pressure. As per the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
saying
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
“When in the Rome, do as the Romans do” one should adopt the changing surroundings to be in the race.

Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'mould' is British English.
mould
with the environment, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not forget their roots. They should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
attires whenever possible.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
related to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them look
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
old fashioned
. Youngster
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feels
that this will affect their public image.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them are not even aware of their traditions.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
creating awareness is the need.
For instance
, parents should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
. This will give education to their children about their customs.
In addition
to this, employers should motivate their workers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, at least once in the year.

In the conclusion, it is true that modernization has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
adversely
. This essay discussed that it is necessary to adopt vicinity and blend in it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it is
also
mandatory to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with your long established traditions.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Describe a hotel you stayed at Name and location of the hotel where an when you went Facilities offered by the hotel management v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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