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Describe a friend you admire. you should say; who it is, when did you meet, what do you like about him, what do you do together. v.1

Describe a friend you admire. you should say; who it is, when did you meet, what do you like about him, what do you do together. v. 1
It is argued that renowned movies and games containing violence put an adverse impact, so, persons demand a ban. And, I totally agree. However, others believe that they are non-problematic and assist to perplex. Therefore, I am going to portray about it in detail in the succeeding paragraphs. On the one hand, it is apparent that miscellaneous games as well as pictures have violent material in them. So today, masses have to face several hurdles because of them. To illustrate, I would like to cite that, as we know that PUBG game is quite prominent worldwide among all age group's folks. But, a recent study found that by playing this game many cases like suicide, murder, mental illness have popped out in diverse nations. Apart from this, some mental hospitals are also being opened, too. Thus, such games and movies must be banned. Also, on the flip side, many individuals claim that these movies and games are not detrimental. For the reason that, as a matter of fact, those human beings who acquires self control and play such games and watch films, believe that these things do not have negative effects. So, they just feel tranquil by playing and seeing them. Because, these things are generally preferred as leisure activities. Hence, it may be possible that people may not have much time to spend on them. That is why, they consider it as non-hazardious. In conclusion, as I have mentioned earlier that violent movies and games must be banned because it increases crime and health issues, but there are a positive impacts of it as well, nevertheless every rose have thorns.
It
is argued
that renowned
movies
and
games
containing violence put an adverse impact,
so
, persons demand a ban. And, I
totally
agree
.
However
, others believe that they are non-problematic and assist to perplex.
Therefore
, I am going to portray about it in detail in the succeeding paragraphs.

On the one hand, it is apparent that miscellaneous
games
as well
as pictures have violent material in them.
So
today
, masses
have to
face several hurdles
because
of them. To illustrate, I would like to cite that, as we know that PUBG game is quite prominent worldwide among all age group's folks.
But
, a recent study found that by playing this game
many
cases like suicide, murder, mental illness have popped out in diverse nations. Apart from this,
some
mental hospitals are
also
being opened
, too.
Thus
, such
games
and
movies
must
be banned
.

Also
, on the flip side,
many
individuals claim that these
movies
and
games
are not detrimental. For the reason that, as a matter of fact, those human beings who acquires
self control
and play such
games
and
watch
films, believe that these things do not have
negative
effects.
So
, they
just
feel tranquil by playing and seeing them.
Because
, these things are
generally
preferred as leisure activities.
Hence
, it may be possible that
people
may not have much time to spend on them.
That is
why, they consider it as
non-hazardious
.

In conclusion
, as I have mentioned earlier that violent
movies
and
games
must
be banned
because
it increases crime and health issues,
but
there are a
positive
impacts of it
as well
,
nevertheless
every rose have thorns.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Describe a friend you admire. you should say; who it is, when did you meet, what do you like about him, what do you do together. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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