Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

d social facilities for lwhat extent do you agree or disagree?

d social facilities for lwhat extent APm0w
Owing to the contemporary Era, due to industrialization, more multinational companies developed almost in each and every country. It is argued by some people that these big organizations should promote social development and sports for the regional body of their area. In my opinion, I completely agreed with this argument and my supporting view is discussed further in this article. The first and foremost argument that supports my view related to sports is that it is necessary to exercise to maintain the mental and physical health of every employee. If a company encourages sports activities it is very helpful for their employees as they are tired with hectic work arrangements provided by organizations to achieve the company's goal. As a result, such activities are beneficial for companies in the long term for growth as well as their employee satisfaction. For example, our TBEA group organized "sports festivals" in January month because all employees tried in December Month in search of achieving yearly targets. So, this platforms, appreciated by each and every employee as it relaxes our mind and moreover it maintains our physical fitness. On the flip side, social development is very important for employees to maintain their culture and traditions. Many organizations support employee values and try to help them to maintain and remember their traditional values. For instance, our TBEA group every year organizes "Cultural Events" in which both Chinese and Indian participate. This year, we have performed "Garba" which is our Guajarati folk dance so it is very much enjoyed by all Indian employees and their families hence this type of cultural program boosts our engagement towards our traditional dance. To recapitulate, the game events and social gathering are key beneficial to the community which amplifies positive and healthy environments and lead to peace. Additionally, such steps could improve people's skills and fount their talents. Big organizations must do such types of activities to encourage their community.
Owing to the contemporary Era, due to industrialization, more multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
developed almost in each and every country. It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that these
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
should promote social development and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
for the regional body of their area. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with this argument and my supporting view
is discussed
further
in this article.

The
first
and foremost argument that supports my view related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is that it is necessary to exercise to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintain
the mental and physical health of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
. If a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
encourages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
activities it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
as they
are tired
with hectic work arrangements provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
to achieve the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
's goal.
As a result
, such activities are beneficial for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
in the long term for growth
as well
as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
satisfaction.
For example
, our
Possible spelling mistake found.
TBEA
group organized
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
sports festivals
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
in January month
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
tried in December Month in search of achieving yearly targets.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, this platforms, appreciated by each and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
as it relaxes our mind and
moreover
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintains
our physical fitness.

On the flip side, social development is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintain
their culture and traditions.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
values and try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintain
and remember their traditional values.
For instance
, our
Possible spelling mistake found.
TBEA
group every year organizes
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Cultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Events
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
in which both Chinese and Indian participate. This year, we have performed
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garba
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
which is our
Possible spelling mistake found.
Guajarati
folk dance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much enjoyed by all Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
and their families
hence
this type of cultural program boosts our engagement towards our traditional dance.

To recapitulate, the game
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and social gathering are key beneficial to the community which amplifies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and healthy environments and lead to peace.
Additionally
, such steps could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and fount their talents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
do such types of activities to encourage their community.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay d social facilities for lwhat extent

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts