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Crime is increasing day by day are you agree

Crime is increasing day by day are you agree ee1GA
Many countries today are grappling with the best ways to curb rising crime rates and some have suggested that increased police presence on the streets is the optimal solution. Although I think this would have a positive effect for obvious reasons, the best solution is more nuanced and requires a deeper understanding of the sources underlying crime. There is little doubt that employing greater numbers of police officers will have an adverse affect on criminality. One of the best examples of this would be in New York City under Mayor Rudy Giuliani during the late 1980s and early 90s. At that time, New York was a haven for criminals and many areas of the city were deemed too dangerous by residents to safely live in or walk through at night. One of the many measures that Giuliani used to reduce crime was significantly increasing the number of police officers during his time in office. This led to a reciprocal decline in crime and made the tourist-heavy neighbourhoods almost entirely safe and the rougher districts at least passably crime-free.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are grappling with the best ways to curb rising crime rates and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
have suggested that increased police presence on the streets is the optimal solution. Although I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this would have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect for obvious reasons, the best solution is more nuanced and requires a deeper understanding of the sources underlying crime.

There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
doubt that employing greater numbers of police officers will have an adverse
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on criminality. One of the best examples of this would be in New York City under Mayor Rudy Giuliani during the late 1980s and early 90s. At that time, New York was a haven for criminals and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
areas of the city
were deemed
too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
by residents to
safely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in or walk through at night. One of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
measures that Giuliani
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
crime was
significantly
increasing the number of police officers during his time in office. This led to a reciprocal decline in crime and made the tourist-heavy
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhoods' is British English.
neighbourhoods
almost
entirely
safe and the rougher districts at least
passably
crime-free.

IELTS essay Crime is increasing day by day are you agree

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
178 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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