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covid pandemic in ho chi minh city

covid pandemic in ho chi minh city yDmld
In these days, spreading of COVID-19 in HCM City is still high. We must find the main causes and resolve them. If the situation is not changed. It is very dangerous. To begin with, we need to consider again testing Covid 19 to allow to work. Gathering a lot of people at one location such as hospitals or clinics is easy to spread of the virus. Why did they have to test Covid in every three days? That reason why from July to August, the number of patients of Covid-19 were terribly increase. In addition, individuals who have come into close contact with anyone carrying the virus go to a quarantine camp. So many people had been infected in there. They just needed to stay less than two meters from confirmed patient for 30 minutes and they would have to go to a quarantine camp in 21 days. Therefore, they were virus cross-contamination. And by September 12, 298, 549 patients of Covid-19 and 11, 992 fatalities have been recorded in Ho Chi Minh City, the highest numbers in the country. Furthermore, going to the market by permit was also a reason spreading of Covid 19 pandemic. Local markets, groceries had been locked down. Individuals had one day in few hours to buy food. Only supermarkets and Bach Hoa Xanh store were opened. So the people crowd out in there. As a results, pandemic still horribly spread. Until now, The Ministry of Health confirmed 11, 692 new COVID-19 cases on Tuesday, raising the national patient tally to 707, 436. Ho Chi Minh City remains the biggest hotspot with 348, 220 confirmed cases. In conclusion, the government ought to find the ways to control the pandemic, increasing vaccine take-up and improving treatment capacity to reduce fatalities are the good ways to decrease patients. Local authorities must ensure supply of food and other essential services for residents.
In these days, spreading of COVID-19 in
Possible spelling mistake found.
HCM
City is
still
high. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
find the main causes and resolve them.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
the situation is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, we need to consider again testing
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
Covid 19
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
Did you mean "working"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to work
. Gathering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
at one location such as hospitals or clinics is easy to spread of the virus. Why did they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
Covid
in every three days? That reason why from July to August, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
of Covid-19 were
terribly
Consider using a past participle here: "increased".
increase
.

In addition
, individuals who have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
into close contact with anyone carrying the virus go to a quarantine camp.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had
been infected
in there. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
needed to stay less than two meters from confirmed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patient
for 30
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
minutes and
they would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go to a quarantine camp in 21 days.
Therefore
, they were virus cross-contamination. And by September 12, 298, 549
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
of Covid-19 and 11, 992 fatalities have
been recorded
in Ho Chi Minh City, the highest numbers in the country.

Furthermore
, going to the market by permit was
also
a reason spreading of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
Covid 19
pandemic. Local markets, groceries had
been locked
down. Individuals had one day in few hours to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
food.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
supermarkets and Bach
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hoa
Possible spelling mistake found.
Xanh
store
were opened
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
crowd out in there. As
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a result" or simply "results"?
a results
, pandemic
still
horribly
spread. Until
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, The Ministry of Health confirmed 11, 692 new COVID-19 cases on Tuesday, raising the national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patient
tally to 707, 436. Ho Chi Minh City remains the biggest hotspot with 348, 220 confirmed cases.

In conclusion
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ought to find the ways to control the pandemic, increasing vaccine take-up and improving treatment capacity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
fatalities are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
ways to decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
. Local authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
ensure supply of food and other essential services for residents.
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IELTS essay covid pandemic in ho chi minh city

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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