Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Counties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some v.3

Counties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some v. 3
Few countries such as India, china and Japan has experienced out of bounds population growth and many intellectuals believe that increasing population has become a real challenge for world and there are various impact on planet. I shall explain the reasons for growing population and ways to handle this problem. There are various reasons for out of proportion population in these countries. First of all, people do not have understanding about the limited resources available on this planet. Many people think that natural resources such as water, mines, gas are unlimited and everlasting, resulting never think about the increasing family size. For instance, my neighbor has eight children and they believe that god has given the children as a gift and will arrange food, shelter, medical etc. on this planet. Secondly, illiteracy is another major problem causing population burst. People particularly poor and un-educated do not have knowledge about the side effect of growing population and also lacks the awareness to overcome such issues. Number of steps can be taken to control the population problem up-to some extent. Awareness should be created among the people about the repercussion of explosive birth rate and measures to control the family size. Private agencies and NGO’s may help to educate the people on this burning issue and positive result could be achieved in long term. Furthermore, government can make regulation and laws regarding no of children a couple may have and violation should be dealt with sanction or debar people from taking government services. For example, China formulated the one child policy and controlled the population in their country. To sum-up, growing population is not only threat to country but also to world as it force people to invade other boundary such as forest, sea etc. therefore, it is mandatory to take corrective action to control the population by creating awareness or applying hard ways.
Few countries such as India, china and Japan has experienced out of bounds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
growth and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
intellectuals believe that increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
has become a real challenge for world and there are various impact on planet. I shall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the reasons for growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and ways to handle this problem.

There are various reasons for out of proportion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in these countries.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have understanding about the limited resources available on this planet.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that natural resources such as water, mines, gas
are unlimited
and everlasting, resulting never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the increasing family size.
For instance
, my neighbor has eight
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
children and
they believe that god has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the children as a gift and will arrange food, shelter, medical etc. on this planet.
Secondly
, illiteracy is another major problem causing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
burst.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
particularly
poor and
Possible spelling mistake found.
un-educated
do not have knowledge about the side effect of growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and
also
lacks the awareness to overcome such issues.

Number of steps can
be taken
to control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
problem up-to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent. Awareness should
be created
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about the repercussion of explosive birth rate and measures to control the family size. Private agencies and NGO’s may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to educate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
on this burning issue and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
result could
be achieved
in long term.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
regulation and laws regarding
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
of children a couple may have and violation should
be dealt
with sanction or debar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from taking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
services.
For example
, China formulated the one child policy and controlled the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in their country.

To sum-up, growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
threat to country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to world as it
Did you mean "forces"?
force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to invade other boundary such as forest, sea etc.
therefore
, it is mandatory to take corrective action to control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
by creating awareness or applying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
ways.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Counties such as China, India and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts