Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional ways of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.1

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional ways of food preparation. with this opinion? v. 1
There is no doubt that food habits have been changed drastically in the last few years. Numerous workers or busy individuals find the processed food as the best solution for them during their tough day. Therefore, many of them think that conventional food will be ultimately disappeared. However, I wholeheartedly disagree with that and this essay will explore the reasons of my opinion in further detail. To commence with, it’s irrefutable that the way of people living have a conspicuous influence on individuals’s diet selection. Firstly, plenty of workers have insufficient time during their duties to make their food, therefore, they resort to eat from fast food restaurant in order to save their time. Nevertheless, traditional foods are unlikely to be vanished for several causes. First of all, it considers as a part of family connection in different civilizations. For instance, Al-Mansaf is a name of Jordanian traditional meal, . the main ingredients of it is rice and meat. Many households indeed, cook it during some big events such as wedding, graduation, and religious days where the whole family will be existed in it. Another example, is a roasted turkey dish that many families in the western areas cook it during occasion like Christmas to celebrate this day with their beloved ones. In addition, the popularity of food shows have increased dramatically these days. Many TV channels specialize some programs that provide delicious and easy recipes for people. This move in fact, motivates lots of individuals to cook by themselves. Take the most famous Arabic chef, Mr. Moh Al-Zamel as an example. He has been offering many tasty recipes for over than 5 years through his page on Instagram. The way of his cooking has lured many individuals to follow him and cook a healthy food by themselves. To sum up, changing of people life has impacted on their diet choices. Nonetheless, in my point of view, I strongly believe that conventional meals and the way of preparation it, will never be affected due to the mentioned causes.
There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habits have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
drastically
in the last few years. Numerous workers or busy individuals find the processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
as the best solution for them during their tough day.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
will be
ultimately
disappeared.
However
, I
wholeheartedly
disagree with that and this essay will explore the reasons of my opinion in
further
detail.

To commence with, it’s irrefutable that the way of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living have a conspicuous influence on
Did you mean "individual’s" or "individuals’"?
individuals’s
diet selection.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of workers have insufficient time during their duties to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
therefore
, they resort to eat from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
restaurant in order to save their time.

Nevertheless
, traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are unlikely to
be vanished
for several causes.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it considers as a part of family connection in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
civilizations.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Al-Mansaf
is a name of Jordanian traditional meal
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
main ingredients of it is rice and meat.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
households
indeed
, cook it during
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
such as wedding, graduation, and religious
It is better to use 'days' with the time-relative pronoun 'when': "days when". (Alternatively, use 'in/on which')
days where
the whole family will
be existed
in it. Another example, is a roasted turkey dish that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
families in the western areas cook it during occasion like Christmas to celebrate this day with their beloved ones.

In addition
, the popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
have increased
dramatically
these days.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
TV channels specialize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
programs that provide delicious and easy recipes for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
in fact, motivates lots of individuals to cook by themselves. Take the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Arabic chef, Mr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Moh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Al-Zamel
as an example. He has been offering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tasty recipes for
Use "(over)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
over
than 5 years through his page on Instagram. The way of his cooking has lured
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals to follow him and cook a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
by themselves.

To sum up, changing of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
life has impacted on their diet choices. Nonetheless, in my point of view, I
strongly
believe that conventional meals and the way of preparation it, will never be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
due to the mentioned causes.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional ways of food preparation. with this opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
338 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts