Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Computer is now becoming an essential part of university education. Some people believe that using computers brings more benefits than its drawbacks. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computer is now becoming an essential part of university education. Some people believe that using computers brings more benefits than its drawbacks. nXpEg
Moving towards to 21st century, computers are being more and more popular, especially in universities. Many people strongly believe that the advantages of computers are outweigh its drawbacks. Having said that, some argue that this may have some negative effects on students. As far as I am concernes, I wholeheartedly agree with the latter argument, and some major points will be addressed in the followinng paragraphs. On the one hand, there is a clear evidence for people to defend their opposite view that using computers brings more benefits than its drawbacks. Computers are products drawn from the gray matter of scientists. It brings convinience, quicks in order to improve our life. For example, office work becomes much more compact, using the computer to edit and store files clearly in the computer, just a few clicks, you can easily search and repair the documents that you need. On the other hand, there are a number of points for other people to strongly support the latter argument. First and foremost, it is well-documented that students are being more subjected on computers. This non face-to-face communication can affects the role of lectures. Secondly, some students may not concentrated on study and playing games instead of doing homework. Last but not least, spendinng too much time on interner can make young people have a wrong way of thinking about life. For instance, many young people beacause of unhealthy video that become far into social evils. Taking everything into account, it í my strong belief that using computers brings serious harm more than its benefits to university students. Accordingly, I highly recommend that the govenrments should enhance people’s awareness in terms of the harm of using computers in the university study. If this recommendation carried out, the comprehensive development of our future generations will be guaranteed.
Moving towards to 21st century, computers are being more and more popular,
especially
in universities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
strongly
believe that the advantages of computers are
Consider using a past participle here: "outweighed".
outweigh
its drawbacks. Having said that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that this may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. As far as I am
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "concerns", the plural form of the noun 'concern'?
concernes
, I
wholeheartedly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the latter argument, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major points will
be addressed
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
followinng
paragraphs.

On the one hand, there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
evidence for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to defend their opposite view that using computers brings more benefits than its drawbacks. Computers are products drawn from the gray matter of scientists. It brings
Possible spelling mistake found.
convinience
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
quicks
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our life.
For example
, office work becomes much more compact, using the computer to edit and store files
clearly
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the computer".
in the computer
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a few clicks, you can
easily
search and repair the documents that you need.

On the other hand
, there are a number of points for other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
strongly
support the latter argument.
First
and foremost, it is well-documented that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are being more subjected on computers. This
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non face-to-face
communication can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "affect"
affects
the role of lectures.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may not
The verb 'may' requires the base form of the verb: "concentrate"
concentrated
on study and playing games
instead
of doing homework. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
Possible spelling mistake found.
spendinng
too much time on
Possible spelling mistake found.
interner
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way of thinking about life.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacause
of unhealthy video that become far into social evils.

Taking everything into account, it í my strong belief that using computers brings serious harm more than its benefits to university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Accordingly
, I
highly
recommend that the
Possible spelling mistake found.
govenrments
should enhance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
awareness in terms of the harm of using computers in the university study. If this recommendation carried out, the comprehensive development of our future generations will
be guaranteed
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Computer is now becoming an essential part of university education. Some people believe that using computers brings more benefits than its drawbacks.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 5band
    What makes someone a good role model
    Being a good role model means being committed to the good qualities that certainly make you an example in society, such as being confident, having high moral values, being respectful and positive, but above all be confident in yourself. A person who wants to be a good role model must pay attention t...
  • 5.5band
    In current society many are struggling obesity. What are the causes and effects of it?
    Today, more and more people are tackling with obesity die to the popularity of detrimental aspects. So many consider that overweight is always caused by overeating. Thus, it is clear that this issue have consequences that happened for some reasons. First of all, there is an argument that overeating ...
  • 5band
    : Do you think advertisements actually influence people to buy things?
    Of course, advertising has a profound influence on product purchase and selection. In a time when the advertising industry is extremely developed, customers will choose products with better advertising, more investment instead of products with sketchy advertising. Besides, a good and persuasive adve...
  • 5.5band
    In fact, there are many children who are members of a large family. That has its own benefits and drawbacks.
    In fact, there are many children who are members of a large family. That has its own benefits and drawbacks. On the one hand, these children would have things which the only one never have. First, if being a child in a big family, he or she would be blissful. The children, especially the youngest c...
  • 5band
    How do advertisement attract attention?
    It all depends on what group of people the advertisement is aimed for. Young people look if it’s cool, hip, or fashionable; whereas older people tend to be more practical-minded, so those in charge of advertising need to have a clear idea of who they will be targeting with their advertisement, and p...
  • 6band
    How to write a satatement of purpose over 500 word
    Motivation Letter There are many significant reasons to explain why the Master’s study in Electrical Engineering And Information Technology at Kiel University is the ideal program for me to accomplish my higher studies and career goals. The key force that encouraged me to apply for this program As i...