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cities are over crowded today

cities are over crowded today 6N1bK
The proliferation in the population became an acute menace of the world. Moreover, urban areas are enormously expanding and becoming congested. Although, this concern can be attributed to the whole host of reasons, we will ponder the necessary remedies that should be considered to address this problem. To commence with, first and foremost cause of overpopulation is ample employment services, which are readily available in the big huge cities. In other words, an individual easily gets a job opportunity whether he or she or not has a specific academic background; additionally, myriad of industries are maily mainly situated in the city centre and are responsible for alluring more and more outsiders. However, this troublesome situation can be tackled by encouraging rural people to own their own a small tiny businesses, particularly local craft work, handmade jewellery, fishing, farming and several others. The second prominent reason of for shifting metropolitan areas is the requirement of the a stable life. To illustrate an instance example, people are raising their living standards as the legal authorities provide excellent health-care facilities to the city residents. What is more, the education system is far better than villages' one such as the modern classroom with beneficial amenities. By introducing this contemporary education system into the suburb places, a student will not only acquire knowledge, but moreover also he/she will enhance his/her cognitive skill. To recapitulate, though there are certainly numerous causes of overcrowding in the developed areas, yet this problem could be mitigated by taking serious steps. If the government implements the transport system and develops outskirt areas, rural dwellers will be less likely to shift towards big enormous cities because of owing to the fact that self-dependency as well as inferiority issue, among especially among pupils, will be plummeted.
The proliferation in the population became an acute menace of the world.
Moreover
, urban
areas
are
enormously
expanding and becoming congested. Although, this concern can
be attributed
to the whole host of reasons, we will ponder the necessary remedies that should
be considered
to address this problem.

To commence with,
first
and foremost cause of overpopulation is ample employment services, which are
readily
available in the
big
huge
cities
.
In other words
, an individual
easily
gets
a job opportunity whether he or she or not has a specific academic background;
additionally
, myriad of industries are
maily
mainly
situated in the city
centre
and are responsible for alluring more and more outsiders.
However
, this troublesome situation can
be tackled
by encouraging rural
people
to
own
their
own
a
small
tiny
businesses
,
particularly
local craft work, handmade
jewellery
, fishing, farming and several others.

The second prominent reason of for shifting metropolitan
areas
is the requirement of
the a
stable life. To illustrate an instance example,
people
are raising their living standards as the legal authorities provide excellent health-care facilities to the city residents.
What is more
, the education system is far better than villages' one such as the modern classroom with beneficial amenities. By introducing this contemporary education system into the suburb places, a student will not
only
acquire knowledge,
but
moreover
also
he/she will enhance his/her cognitive
skill
.

To recapitulate, though there are
certainly
numerous causes of overcrowding in the developed
areas
,
yet
this problem could
be mitigated
by taking serious steps. If the
government
implements the transport system and develops outskirt
areas
, rural dwellers will be less likely to shift towards
big
enormous
cities
because
of owing to the fact that self-dependency
as well
as inferiority issue, among
especially
among pupils, will
be plummeted
.
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IELTS essay cities are over crowded today

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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