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Children and Education in Sri Lanka now

Children and Education in Sri Lanka now PrLy2
My topic is here to elaborate the current situation in Sri Lanka with regard to children and education. In my opinion the level of education which our children receive compared to the other countries is in the lower level. I will justify my answers in the below paragraphs. There are around 20% of children out of the population in our country and out of that amount 17. 5% children belong to the poor rural areas. Balance children are around the cities. When you go through moreover on this, one could find that 3% of the children are upper middle class or middle class families. So the financial background and the access to the modern technologies and infrastructures are utmost difficult. Getting a computer or an internet connection is a luxury or, unaffordable burden as the current economic crisis. Most of the government owned schools in the rural areas lack computers and internet facilities. Demand to occupy a computer in the school time is high due to the pupils per computer ratio. the parents are also helpless on this matter and seeks the aid of the relevant authorities. In the Sabaragamuva province there are only 13 computer labs for all the 120 schools. The context of the education which our children receive are somewhat outdated and it should be revised and should be allowed on research basis. Where the student learn from the environment, go out and find facts and details through experience. The grade five students are still learning the subjects that are being followed since 1995. I would suggest that these grassroot level issues should be escalated to the higher management and raise the level of our school syllabus and make more cash flows to the schools itself, So that they could enhance the levels of learning. Public schools should be given more infrastructure and resources.
My topic is here to elaborate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation in Sri Lanka with regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and education. In my opinion the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
of education which our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
receive compared to the other countries is in the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
. I will justify my answers in the below paragraphs. There are around 20% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
out of the population in our country and out of that amount 17. 5%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
belong to the poor rural areas. Balance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are around the cities. When you go through
moreover
on this, one could find that 3% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are upper middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
or middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
families.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the financial background and the access to the modern technologies and infrastructures are utmost difficult. Getting a computer or an internet connection is a luxury or, unaffordable burden as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
economic crisis.

Most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
in the rural areas lack computers and internet facilities. Demand to occupy a computer in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
time is high due to the pupils per computer ratio.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
parents are
also
helpless on this matter and seeks the aid of the relevant authorities. In the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sabaragamuva
province there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
13 computer labs for all the 120
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. The context of the education which our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
receive are somewhat outdated and it should
be revised
and should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
on research basis. Where the student learn from the environment, go out and find facts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
through experience. The grade five students are
still
learning the subjects that are
being followed
since 1995.

I would suggest that these grassroot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
issues should
be escalated
to the higher management and raise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
syllabus and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more cash flows to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
itself,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that they could enhance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of learning. Public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more infrastructure and resources.
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IELTS essay Children and Education in Sri Lanka now

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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