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cause of drug among youths

cause of drug among youths Nlrwg
Nowadays, the young generation is seen as the future master of country and play an important role in notional economy. Besides the education policies, the government promotes variance of adolescent activities also. However, not only has the standard of life been improved because of human self-improvement, but it is also the main factor raising the social maladies, namely drug abuse. There are numerous reasons for this state among youths, but the lack of family sentiment and peer pressure are regarded as the main cause. One of the main reasons cause of drug abuse is the lack of family love. In modern society, some parents only focus on making a bundle and have too little time to spend with their children. It is no exaggeration that they set great store by earning much money than spend time on talking or sharing with their kids about life lesson. Over time, it creates an invisible barrier which makes them uncomfortable to put their feelings into words among family members. As a result, the youths abuse drug addiction as a possibly effective way to relieve their state of mind. In addition, the abuse rate of drugs may be attributed to pressure of peers and friends. As their parents don't spend much time on talking to their kids and teaching them at all, children probably tend to find out their friends whom they are considered to be good and kind to ask for advice. Then, these seniors and friends may put a foolish idea into your child's head that using drugs permanently overcomes sadness at the first try. When it comes to the truth, it is so belated a circumstance that their parents can not help them get over this situation. Poor connections between parents and children as well as peer pressure are some of the factors that contribute to this social issue. Drug usage, in my opinion, is tremendously destructive not only teenagers but also to the whole society. This situation might lead to a disaster in a specific civilization unless the government enacts stronger rules.
Nowadays, the young generation is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as the future master of country and play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in notional economy.
Besides
the education policies, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
promotes variance of adolescent activities
also
.
However
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has the standard of life been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of human self-improvement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
also
the main factor raising the social maladies,
namely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abuse
. There are numerous reasons for this state among youths,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the lack of family sentiment and peer pressure
are regarded
as the main cause.

One of the main reasons cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abuse
is the lack of family
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
. In modern society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus on making a bundle and have too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with their children. It is no exaggeration that they set great store by earning much money than spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on talking or sharing with their kids about life lesson. Over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, it creates an invisible barrier which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them uncomfortable to put their feelings into words among family members.
As a result
, the youths
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abuse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
addiction as a
possibly
effective way to relieve their state of mind.

In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abuse
rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
may
be attributed
to pressure of peers and friends.

As their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
don't spend much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on talking to their kids and teaching them at all, children
probably
tend to find out their friends whom they
are considered
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and kind to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
advice. Then, these seniors and friends may put a foolish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
into your child's head that using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
permanently
overcomes sadness at the
first
try. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the truth, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
belated a circumstance that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
over this situation.

Poor connections between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and children
as well
as peer pressure are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
factors that contribute to this social issue.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Drug
usage, in my opinion, is
tremendously
destructive not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to the whole society. This situation might lead to a disaster in a specific civilization unless the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
enacts stronger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
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IELTS essay cause of drug among youths

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
342 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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