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“Cars enslave us rather than liberate us” Do you agree ?

“Cars enslave us rather than liberate us” Do you agree? awl5X
Can you imagine what it must be like to live in a air polluted-city due to car exhaust, and sit in a car, in a long, slow-moving queue of traffic when being in hurry to go somewhere? In my opinion, the idea that car enslave us rather that liberate us is certainly true. In the first place, in order to make a car affordable, one is to apply himself to his work. The main reason for this is that not only are cars exurberant, but the monthly maintenance cost also is not of low price. Therefore, if one deserves a car, he must be assiduous in working. Secondly, people who own cars always feel a lot of anxiety about their cars being purloined or inflicted irrepairable damge on. With the view to attending to this worry, they have to have expensive alarm systems and security cameras installed in their cars and, to make situation deteriorated, car-possessors must avoid areas of the city where their cars get broken into or stolen. Furthermore, on account of cars, the quality of life in the cities are steadily worsening. There are, for exmaple, traffic congestion all the times, which causes a lot of inconvenience. What is more, owing to cars discharging exhaust fumes in plenty into the environment on a daily basis, air of the cities is becoming contaminated. Such the substandard habitat is that people could not live. There are those who argue, on the other hand, that cars enable us to go to places freely as well as avoid public transport deficiency. They point out that if one want to go to the coast for a holiday, there are not any vehicles that one can use to arrive; thus, car is a appropriate choice for this situation. In addition, there is often a insuffiency of public transports owing to the today’s increasing population; for this reason, a car is a reasonable replacement for others vehicles, especially, when one is in a tearing hurry. My belief is, nonetheless, that these examples are of scarity of persuasiveness and the frustration that cars cause us is still too much. Taking these points into consideration, it seems to me that car-owners are constrained by cars rather than gain the freedom and advantages from it, to a certain extent. Although possessing a cars has both benefits and drawbacks, have you ever wondered that its minus points outweigh its plus points?
Can you imagine what it
must
be like to
live
in
a
air polluted-city due to
car
exhaust, and

sit in a
car
, in a long, slow-moving queue of traffic when being in hurry to go somewhere? In my opinion, the
idea
that
car
enslave us
rather
that liberate us is
certainly
true.

In the
first
place, in order to
make
a
car
affordable, one is to apply himself to his work.

The main reason for this is that not
only
are
cars
exurberant
,
but
the monthly

maintenance cost
also
is not of low price.
Therefore
, if one deserves a
car
, he
must
be

assiduous in working.

Secondly
,
people
who
own
cars
always feel
a lot of
anxiety about their
cars
being purloined
or inflicted
irrepairable
damge
on. With the view to attending to this worry,

they
have to
have expensive alarm systems and security cameras installed in their cars

and, to
make
situation deteriorated, car-possessors
must
avoid areas of the city where

their
cars
get
broken into or stolen.

Furthermore
, on account of
cars
, the quality of life in the cities are
steadily
worsening.

There are, for
exmaple
, traffic congestion all the times, which causes
a lot of


inconvenience.
What is more
, owing to
cars
discharging exhaust fumes in
plenty
into the

environment on a daily basis, air of the cities is becoming contaminated. Such the

substandard habitat is that
people
could not
live
.

There are those who argue,
on the other hand
, that
cars
enable us to go to places
freely


as well
as avoid public transport deficiency. They
point
out that if one want to go to the

coast for a holiday, there are not any vehicles that one can
use
to arrive;
thus
,
car
is
a


appropriate choice for this situation.
In addition
, there is
often
a
insuffiency
of public

transports owing to the
today
’s increasing population;
for this reason
, a
car
is a

reasonable replacement for others vehicles,
especially
, when one is in a tearing hurry.

My belief is, nonetheless, that these examples are of
scarity
of persuasiveness and the

frustration that
cars
cause us is
still
too much.

Taking these
points
into consideration, it seems to me that car-owners
are constrained


by
cars
rather
than gain the freedom and advantages from it, to a certain extent.

Although possessing a
cars
has both benefits and drawbacks, have you ever wondered

that its minus
points
outweigh its plus
points
?
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IELTS essay “Cars enslave us rather than liberate us” Do you agree?

Essay
  American English
11 paragraphs
403 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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