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Buying a house is beneficial or rental home is beneficial? Write ur Opinion

Buying a house is beneficial or rental home is beneficial? Write ur Opinion mLeN8
In many nations around the world, a great number of people who think that owning a house are beneficial than renting. However, this incident doesn't apply to certain country, for example, India, Indonesia and Malaysia. This is because the poverty families are in a large number as compared to prosperity families, thus the merely choices they have are renting a home. From my perspective, I strongly agree that buying a house is greatly beneficial than owning a home. There are two main benefits of buying a house. Firstly, there is a permanent and secure resident to stay throughout the entire of the life. This is because people who have bought a house, they don't need to move regularly and pay extra rental fees for the unnecessary charges which charged by the owner. For instance, in Singapore, the majority of the room rental are excluded for the utilities, which means that every month they have to top up extra expenses on the utilities based on their usage. As a result, people who have bought a house don't need to think about these issues monthly. In addition, people who owning a house can earn money by renting out the room to the public. This is very common incidents which happen in the well-developed countries, for example Europe, USA and many more. Take Singapore as an example, the employees are from all over the world, to say that, the majority of the house owners in Singapore will rent out the empty room for the foreigners and from here, they earned the rental fees and at the same time they just top up the money for the monthly installment. On the other hand, the most enormous drawback of renting a home is the tenants need to tolerate with the other roommates as well as house owner. This is because tenants usually will be sharing the room or the house with others, so they must be well communicated among each others in order to prevent happens in conflict. As a result, people who are hardly adapt themselves in such environment will faced some difficulties to stay longer in a residence. To sum up, I believe buying a house and staying together with family are the best things ever as compared to sharing a room or house with others, so that we can have a freedom and feel of comfortable in the house.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations around the world, a great number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
are
Use "(beneficial)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
beneficial
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renting
.
However
, this incident doesn't apply to certain country,
for example
, India, Indonesia and Malaysia. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the poverty families are in a large number as compared to prosperity families,
thus
the
merely
choices they have are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renting
a home. From my perspective, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is
greatly
Use "(beneficial)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
beneficial
than owning a home.

There are two main benefits of buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
Firstly
, there is a permanent and secure resident to stay throughout the entire of the life. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, they don't need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
regularly
and pay extra rental fees for the unnecessary charges which charged by the owner.
For instance
, in Singapore, the majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
rental
are excluded
for the utilities, which means that every month they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
top up extra expenses on the utilities based on their usage.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
don't need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about these issues monthly.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
owning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
can earn money by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renting
out the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
to the public. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common incidents which happen in the well-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
,
for example
Europe, USA and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. Take Singapore as an example, the employees are from all over the world, to say that, the majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
owners in Singapore will rent out the empty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
for the foreigners and from here, they earned the rental fees and at the same time they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
top up the money for the monthly installment.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the most enormous drawback of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
renting
a home is the tenants need to tolerate with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
roommates
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
owner. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
tenants
The adverb 'usually' is usually put between 'will' and 'be'.
usually will be
sharing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
with others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be well communicated among each
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "other"?
others
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
happens in conflict.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are hardly
Consider using a past participle here: "adapted".
adapt
themselves in such environment will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "face"
faced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties to stay longer in a residence.

To sum up, I believe buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and staying together with family are the best things ever as compared to sharing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
with others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can have a freedom and feel of comfortable in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
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IELTS essay Buying a house is beneficial or rental home is beneficial? Write ur Opinion

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
397 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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