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Business education must provide environment awareness. Do you agree or disagree?

Business education must provide environment awareness. 0Awbq
In this contemporary era, the world is changing by leaps and bounds. Integration and automation of industrial companies bring many problems related to the environment. So, some people think that business education must provide environmental awareness, whereas the others opine that environmental awareness is a global issue and the government needs to enact some strict laws for this. I totally agree with aforesaid statement. First and foremost, nowadays the rate of wastage produced by people is increasing dramatically. So, the government needs to provide environment awareness along with education can play vital role in this situation. In the schools, the lessons on the environment awareness should be mandatory, so the students will be more aware of the environment related problems like global warming and climate changing because of this the students and the youths think twice before produce wastage. In addition to the above, if the youths are well educated then they will take more holistic approach to mitigate wastage and recycle their rubbish more effectively because of this, they think to protect the environment is their onus. Also, they will teach these moral values to their children as well. Owing to this, the next generation of children is not only thinking about to reduce wastage production, but also they will think about eco-friendly products which are more suitable for the environment. These small steps can go a long way in saving energy and to reduce the rate of rubbish. On the other hand, these people are using more use and throw products so, the proportion of wastage increased greatly. Also, the government does not take active steps to dispose rubbish in a proper way. People are also less aware of the impact of rubbish on environment so, they take little care about it. Due to, lack of awareness in people lead to some gigantic problems like melting of polar ice and global warming. In rural areas, there are lack of sanitary facilities and these lead more incurable diseases in those areas. To keep issues in the prospect, government needs to enact stricter laws for wastage and dispose. Also, mandatory subjects in schools and colleges should be more important to reduce the rate of wastage.
In this contemporary era, the world is changing by leaps and bounds. Integration and automation of industrial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems related to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that business education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
provide environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
, whereas the others opine that environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
is a global issue and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs to enact
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strict laws for this. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with aforesaid statement.

First
and foremost, nowadays the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
produced by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
increasing
dramatically
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
along with education can play vital role in this situation. In the schools, the lessons on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
should be mandatory,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the students will be more aware of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
related problems like global warming and climate changing
because of this
the students and the youths
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
produce wastage.

In addition
to the above, if the youths are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well educated
then they will take more holistic approach to mitigate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
and recycle their rubbish more
effectively
because of this
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is their onus.
Also
, they will teach these moral values to their children
as well
. Owing to this, the
next
generation of children is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thinking about to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
production,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about eco-friendly products which are more suitable for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. These
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
steps can go a long way in saving energy and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the rate of rubbish.

On the other hand
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and throw products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
increased
greatly
.
Also
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
does not take active steps to dispose rubbish
Consider replacing "in a proper way" with the adverb for "proper"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a proper way
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are
also
less aware of the impact of rubbish on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
care about it. Due to, lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
awareness
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
gigantic problems like melting of polar ice and global warming. In rural areas, there are lack of sanitary facilities and these lead more incurable diseases in those areas.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
issues in the prospect,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs to enact stricter laws for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
and dispose.
Also
, mandatory subjects in schools and colleges should be more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
.
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IELTS essay Business education must provide environment awareness.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
365 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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