Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Bringing in foreign workers to fill positions that domestic workers are unwilling to do can cause problems in the local community and should therefore be stopped Do what extent do you agree with this v.7

Bringing in foreign workers to fill positions that domestic workers are unwilling to do can cause problems in the local community and should therefore be stopped Do what extent do you agree with this v. 7
Some people argue that the job opportunities for the local people are becoming less day by day because this jobs are given to the foreign people, which may lead to a financial loss among the local workers and that this needs to end. I agree with the statement, however there are certain jobs that demands certain criteria, that can be only fulfilled by foreign workers. In this essay I will discuss the positive as well as negative points for bringing in the foreign workers. Firstly, there are some type of work that require certain skills and other type are more concerned regarding the looks of their employees, which they need to get in the business. One of the most common type of work that demands high on skills are Spa salons. In India, 65% of people working in spa are from Thailand. It is known that Thai people are one of the best Masseuse in the world. So bringing such skilled people into the country is a little easy, as the employment in India is easy for them, then their own country because, of high demand and good salary structure. Another type of work that requires good looks is working as a Receptionist at Multi national chain of hotels. In India as well as other countries, in hotel business, they will hire a person as a receptionist who has great looks and great communication skill. Certain International Chain of hotels that are present in different countries, will wants to have a person in charge from their own country. In such cases the employers need to follow their selection criteria. In order to stop or decrease the employment of foreign workers in one' s country, the things that can be done is training the people in that area and making them understand the importance of that job. Some of people thinks less or certain tpe of jobs, so that makes employers to hire from foreign nations. I agree that certain job profiles need foreign workers, however to support local workers financially, this position should be limited.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities for the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are becoming less day by day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Did you mean "these"?
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, which may lead to a financial loss among the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
and that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement,
however
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that demands
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
criteria, that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
fulfilled by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
. In this essay I will discuss the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
points for bringing in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
workers.

Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of work that require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
are more concerned regarding the looks of their employees, which they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in the business. One of the most common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of work that demands high on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are Spa salons. In India, 65% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
working in spa are from Thailand. It
is known
that Thai
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are one of the best Masseuse in the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
bringing such skilled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
easy, as the employment in India is easy for them, then their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, of high demand and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary structure.

Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of work that requires
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
looks is working as a Receptionist at Multi national chain of hotels. In India
as well
as other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, in hotel business, they will hire a person as a receptionist who has great looks and great communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Certain
International Chain of hotels that are present in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, will wants to have a person in charge from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In such cases the employers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to follow their selection criteria.

In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
or decrease the employment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
one&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, the things that can
be done
is training the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in that area and making them understand the importance of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
less or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
Possible spelling mistake found.
tpe
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
employers to hire from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
nations.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
profiles
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
,
however
to support local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
financially
, this position should
be limited
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Bringing in foreign workers to fill positions that domestic workers are unwilling to do can cause problems in the local community and should therefore be stopped Do what extent do you agree with this v. 7

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
345 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts