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Briefly summarize the man's problem. Then state which solution you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v.1

Briefly summarize the man's problem. Then state which solution you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1
Fashion sense around the globe has changed. In old times, people use to wear clothes influenced by their culture, but now people tend to wear the same attire around the globe. In my opinion, this trend of similar clothes around the world is a positive development as it benefits the clothing manufacturers. Moreover, modern clothes are suitable for any profession and reduce the chances of being discriminated. Firstly, People wearing the same clothes across the planet is advantageous for the clothing industry. Clothing Brands can target a mass audience and expand its outlets in many countries. For instance, due to the similar choice of clothing, a very famous brand Levis, has successfully established its stores in most countries. Therefore, similar clothing trends around the world have immensely benefited the garment industry. Secondly, Modern clothes such as jeans and trousers are more comfortable and suitable for any profession. Studies have shown that the majority of people around the globe wear pants and shirts at work. For example, Shalwar Kameez an Asian cultural dress is not suitable for people working in a factory while jeans or trousers are adequate for this type of job. Finally, similar clothing trends help reduce discrimination. Globalization has made countries border-free, and different people from different regions tend to work in other countries. Due to similar clothing, it is hard to judge someone’s nations. For instance, differentiating between a Chinese, a Japanese, and a Korean is difficult if they have similar clothes. Therefore, due to the modern clothing trends, fewer people are becoming victims of discrimination. In conclusion, as fashion sense all around the world has become similar, people tend to wear the same clothes all around the world. This trend has boosted the garment industry. Moreover, modern clothes are more suitable for many professions, and by wearing the same clothes, people are becoming a nation of the world regardless of the different ethnicities.
Fashion sense
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the globe has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
influenced by their culture,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
the same attire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the globe. In my opinion, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development as it benefits the clothing manufacturers.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
suitable
for any profession and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the chances of
being discriminated
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
wearing the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
across the planet is advantageous for the clothing industry. Clothing Brands can target a mass audience and expand its outlets in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
choice of clothing, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
brand Levis, has
successfully
established its stores in most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
clothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
have
immensely
benefited the garment industry.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
such as jeans and trousers are more comfortable and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
suitable
for any profession. Studies have shown that the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the globe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
pants and shirts at work.
For example
, Shalwar
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kameez
an Asian cultural dress is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
suitable
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
working in a factory while jeans or trousers are adequate for this type of job.

Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
clothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
discrimination. Globalization has made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
border-free, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions tend to work in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
clothing, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to judge someone’s nations.
For instance
, differentiating between a Chinese, a Japanese, and a Korean is difficult if they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
.
Therefore
, due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
clothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trends
, fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are becoming victims of discrimination.

In conclusion
, as fashion sense all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
has become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
has boosted the garment industry.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
suitable
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
professions, and by wearing the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are becoming a nation of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
regardless of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ethnicities.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Briefly summarize the man's problem. Then state which solution you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
317 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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