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Biggest Problem Poverty in world

Biggest Problem Poverty in world AR9w
We can define poverty as the condition where the basic needs of a family, like food, shelter, clothing, and education are not fulfilled. It can lead to other problems like poor literacy, unemployment, malnutrition, etc. A poor person is not able to get education due to lack of money and therefore remains unemployed. An unemployed person is not able to buy enough & nutritious food for his family and their health decline. A weak person lacks the energy required for the job. A jobless person remains poor only. Thus we can say that poverty is the root cause of other problems. For measuring poverty United nations have devised two measures of poverty – Absolute & relative poverty. Absolute poverty is used to measure poverty in developing countries like India. Relative poverty is used to measure poverty in developed countries like the USA. In absolute poverty, a line based on the minimum level of income has been created & is called a poverty line. If per day income of a family is below this level, then it is poor or below the poverty line. If per day income of a family is above this level, then it is non-poor or above the poverty line. In India, the new poverty line is Rs 32 in rural areas and Rs 47 in urban areas. The government of India also took several measures to eradicate poverty from India. Some of them are – creating employment opportunities, controlling population, etc. In India, about 60% of the population is still dependent on agriculture for its livelihood. Government has taken certain measures to promote agriculture in India. The government constructed certain dams & canals in our country to provide easy availability of water for irrigation. Government has also taken steps for the cheap availability of seeds & farming equipment to promote agriculture. Government is also promoting farming of cash crops like cotton, instead of food crops. In cities, the government is promoting industrialization to create more jobs. Government has also opened ‘Ration shops’. Other measures include providing free & compulsory education for children up to 14 years of age, scholarship to deserving students from a poor background, providing subsidized houses to poor people, etc.
We can define
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poverty
as the condition where the basic needs of a
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family
, like food, shelter, clothing, and education are not fulfilled. It can lead to other problems like
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poor
literacy, unemployment, malnutrition, etc. A
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poor
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person
is not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
education due to lack of money and
therefore
remains unemployed. An unemployed
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person
is not able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
& nutritious food for his
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family
and their health decline. A weak
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person
lacks the energy required for the job. A jobless
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person
remains
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poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
we can say that
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poverty
is the root cause of other problems.

For measuring
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poverty
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
United nations
have devised two
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measures
of
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poverty
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
Absolute & relative
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poverty
. Absolute
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poverty
is
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used
to
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measure
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poverty
in
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developing countries
like India. Relative
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poverty
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
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measure
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poverty
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
like the USA. In absolute
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poverty
, a
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line
based on the minimum level of income has
been created
&
is called
a
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poverty
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line
. If per day income of a
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family
is below this level, then it is
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poor
or below the
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poverty
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line
. If per day income of a
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family
is above this level, then it is non-poor or above the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
. In India, the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
line
is Rs 32 in rural areas and Rs 47 in urban areas.

The
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government
of India
also
took several
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measures
to eradicate
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poverty
from India.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them are
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
creating employment opportunities, controlling population, etc. In India, about 60% of the population is
still
dependent on agriculture for its livelihood.
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Government
has taken certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
to promote agriculture in India. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
constructed certain dams & canals in our country to provide easy availability of water for irrigation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
has
also
taken steps for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
availability of seeds & farming equipment to promote agriculture.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
is
also
promoting farming of cash crops like cotton,
instead
of food crops. In cities, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is promoting industrialization to create more jobs.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
has
also
opened ‘Ration shops’. Other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
measures
include providing free & compulsory education for children up to 14 years of age, scholarship to deserving students from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
background, providing subsidized
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, etc.
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IELTS essay Biggest Problem Poverty in world

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
367 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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