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Assisting a man who had a traffic accident while riding my bicycle to exercise.

Assisting a man who had a traffic accident while riding my bicycle to exercise. Pk2ME
Last month, I assisted a man who had a traffic accident while riding my bicycle to exercise. That day was distinct from the others. I didn't cycle to the lakeside, where I still did 10 circles every day. I decided to go mountain biking about five kilometers from my house because it was the weekend. On that road, I witnessed a person in a traffic accident on the road by chance. He appeared to be bleeding profusely, and no one was nearby. The person responsible for the accident was nowhere to be found. I rushed over to see him and called a taxi to take him to the nearest hospital. Because he had lost so much blood, the doctors advised me to donate more. I volunteered to give him blood. Not only was I in good health, but my blood type was O as well. He regained consciousness after obtaining a blood transfusion. The nurses helped him to contact his family. He was discharged from the hospital about ten days later and came to thank me.
Last month, I assisted a
man
who had a traffic accident while riding my bicycle to exercise. That day was distinct from the others. I didn't cycle to the lakeside, where I
still
did 10 circles every day. I decided to go mountain biking about five kilometers from my
house
because
it was the weekend. On that road, I witnessed a person in a traffic accident on the road by chance. He appeared to be bleeding
profusely
, and no one was nearby. The person responsible for the accident was nowhere to
be found
. I rushed over to
see
him and called a taxi to take him to the nearest hospital.
Because
he had lost
so
much
blood
, the doctors advised me to donate more. I volunteered to give him
blood
. Not
only
was I in
good
health,
but
my
blood
type was O
as well
. He regained consciousness after obtaining a
blood
transfusion. The nurses
helped
him to contact his family. He
was discharged
from the hospital about ten days later and came to thank me.
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IELTS essay Assisting a man who had a traffic accident while riding my bicycle to exercise.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
176 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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