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As a solution to this concern, guardians must pay more attention to their children and provide required and sufficient leadership and guidance. To illustrate further, unlike schools

As a solution to this concern, guardians must pay more attention to their children and provide required and sufficient leadership and guidance. To illustrate further, unlike schools mbXx8
The syllabus at the degree level is complicated compared to the lessons studied at the school level. There is a tendency that pupils find it complex to complete university-level education in comparison with school-level education. This is because they lose focus in education and enjoy unlimited freedom at university. However, few solutions could be suggested to overcome such consequences which will be illustrated below. To begin with, one evident reason is the loss of focus on the basic objectives of the university entrance. In other words, a student enrolls in a degree to earn higher qualifications and add value to their life which will eventually assist their future job prospects. However, when they enter college, they mostly forget the basics and enroll in extra curriculum activities such as protests and drugs. As a result, quality time is wasted on unproductive activities and sometimes ended up in many social issues. Therefore, it becomes complicated in completing the degree in the exact period. As a solution to this concern, guardians must pay more attention to their children and provide required and sufficient leadership and guidance. To illustrate further, unlike schools, students enjoy more freedom in colleges and associate with other students who come from various backgrounds. Therefore, if children are not given sufficient attention and leadership by their parents, the negative outcome is unavoidable. For instance, a recent study conducted by the University of Colombo revealed that more freedom for students leads to negative consequences hence proper monitoring is required at the university level such as financing and networking. To conclude, the loss of focus which leads to unlimited freedom is considered as one of the major reasons for university education is becoming harder compared to school education. However, the proper guidance and leadership by elders can avoid the negative consequences of this issue hence, parent involvement is mandatory. If parents are able to look after their children until they pass out from campus, the outcome will be productive.
The syllabus at the degree level
is complicated
compared to the lessons studied at the school level. There is a tendency that pupils find it complex to complete university-level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in comparison
with school-level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they lose
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "focus".
focus in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and enjoy unlimited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
However
, few solutions could
be suggested
to overcome such consequences which will
be illustrated
below.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one evident reason is the loss of focus on the basic objectives of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
entrance.
In other words
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
enrolls in a degree to earn higher qualifications and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
value to their life which will
eventually
assist their future job prospects.
However
, when they enter college, they
mostly
forget the basics and enroll in extra curriculum activities such as protests and drugs.
As a result
, quality time
is wasted
on unproductive activities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
ended up in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
social issues.
Therefore
, it becomes complicated in completing the degree in the exact period.

As a solution to this concern, guardians
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
pay more attention to their children and provide required and sufficient leadership and guidance. To illustrate
further
, unlike schools,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
enjoy more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
in colleges and associate with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from various backgrounds.
Therefore
, if children are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
sufficient attention and leadership by their parents, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcome is unavoidable.
For instance
, a recent study conducted by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Colombo revealed that more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences
hence
proper monitoring
is required
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
level such as financing and networking.

To conclude
, the loss of focus which leads to unlimited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
is considered
as one of the major reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is becoming harder compared to school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
However
, the proper guidance and leadership by elders can avoid the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences of this issue
hence
, parent involvement is mandatory. If parents are able to look after their children until they pass out from campus, the outcome will be productive.
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IELTS essay As a solution to this concern, guardians must pay more attention to their children and provide required and sufficient leadership and guidance. To illustrate further, unlike schools

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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