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Artists and scientists both play equally important roles.According to your opinion,who should be given more importance.

Artists and scientists both play equally important roles. According to your opinion, who should be given more importance. lRKeK
It goes without saying the contribution of artists and scientists are both important to society some people claim that scientists make way more contribution, then artist do, while, others argue that this is not true. This essay will discuss both terms, with my opinion, in upcoming fragments. On the one hand, there are myraid of reasons, why people gave more importance to researchers then artists. Initially, inventors introduce various gadgets to individuals lives, which in consequence, make their lives easier in this modern era. To epitome, a great researcher name Thomas Alva Edison invented a bulb for the first time, which is providing artificial light to every person's life. Furthermore, scientists play pivotal role during any case of medical emergency. To be more precisely, during the recent pandemic situation of covid-19, boffins do very hardwork to cure the disease and also gave tried and tested vaccinations to the masses for the prevention from this problem. On the other hand, creators also contributing society with splendid advantages. Firstly, artists provide entertainment to the lives of folks. To elaborate, old masters perform various roles such as of comedian, Hero, villain etc. which reduces stress among individuals and give peace of mind to their lives as well. Moreover, designers also preserve history of their countries. To exemplify, a survey was conducted to years back to know the sources from where people learn their history and the highest data was recorded among paintings, films and dramas which was created by artists. To conclude, scientists as well as artists play equal, valuable and irreplaceable roles in terms of contributing towards society. However, in my opinion, I think researches play more role.
It goes without saying the contribution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientists
are both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way more contribution, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artist
do, while, others argue that this is not true. This essay will discuss both terms, with my opinion, in upcoming fragments.

On the one hand, there are
Possible spelling mistake found.
myraid
of reasons, why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
gave more importance to researchers then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
.
Initially
, inventors introduce various gadgets to individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
, which in consequence,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
easier in this modern era. To epitome, a great researcher name Thomas Alva Edison invented a bulb for the
first
time, which is providing artificial light to every person's life.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientists
play pivotal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
during any case of medical emergency. To be more
precisely
, during the recent pandemic situation of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
, boffins do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
to cure the disease and
also
gave tried and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
vaccinations to the masses for the prevention from this problem.

On the other hand
, creators
also
contributing society with splendid advantages.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
provide entertainment to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of folks. To elaborate,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
masters perform various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
such as of comedian, Hero, villain etc. which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
among individuals and give peace of mind to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as well
.
Moreover
, designers
also
preserve history of their countries. To exemplify, a survey
was conducted
to years back to know the sources from where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
learn their history and the highest data
was recorded
among paintings, films and dramas which
was created
by artists.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scientists
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
play equal, valuable and irreplaceable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
in terms of contributing towards society.
However
, in my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
researches play more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
.
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Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay Artists and scientists both play equally important roles. According to your opinion, who should be given more importance.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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