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Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? GMr0g
Due to the price and access of the technology around the globe, many people under the age of eighteen and above are doing their work and study from their houses. Personally, it gives more benefits than the negatives to the development. On the postitive side, people can get their work done more easily with the technology. Because of the Covid-19 pandemic, they don't go to their workplaces, school or universities as before. Having the Internet and electronic devices at home such as smartphones or computers allow people both the young and old to perform the tasks the same as what they did before. For the children, they can learn and join the classes virtually with their teachers and classmates without any fear. Their teachers assign the work, and they turn it in without any face-to-face meeting. Besides, it would change the atmosphere of their learning and doing researching to expand their knowledge about using the net for their study. For instance, my brother studies online every day with his teachers, and he usually summits his work in Google Classroom. And they would enjoy it more than in the traditional classroom as they can use the Internet to find any information they need. It also protects them from getting the virus. Moreover, it helps the people who always work at the offices or companies to incease their productivity and earn money through the work they have done online. When people still have their job, the country's econmy still progresses. In contrast, technology can also decreases the productivity of the work. Once they are used to working and studying online, they would be less active after using it. The country will not build new buildings and innovation as their people do not have to work in the offices. There will be less investors to the country as they can hire people online. When people depends too much on technology, they would not know how to live without it. In conclusion, technology makes lives easier by letting people to work and learn from their homes. It has more postive impacts for the development of the country.
Due to the price and access of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
around the globe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
under the age of eighteen and above are doing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and study from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.
Personally
, it gives more benefits than the negatives to the development.

On the
Possible spelling mistake found.
postitive
side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
done more
easily
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the Covid-19 pandemic, they don't go to their workplaces, school or universities as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. Having the Internet and electronic devices at home such as smartphones or computers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
both the young and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
to perform the tasks the same as what they did
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. For the children, they can learn and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the classes
virtually
with their teachers and classmates without any fear. Their teachers assign the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, and they turn it in without any face-to-face meeting.
Besides
, it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the atmosphere of their learning and
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "going researching".
doing researching
to expand their knowledge about using the net for their study.
For instance
, my brother studies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
every day with his teachers, and he
usually
summits his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in Google Classroom. And they would enjoy it more than in the traditional classroom as they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the Internet to find any information they need. It
also
protects them from getting the virus.
Moreover
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who always
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at the offices or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
incease
their productivity and earn money through the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
they have done
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
have their job, the country's
Possible spelling mistake found.
econmy
still
progresses.

In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
also
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "decrease"
decreases
the productivity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Once they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to working and studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, they would be less active after using it. The country will not build new buildings and innovation as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the offices. There will be
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun investors is countable.
less
investors to the country as they can hire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
depends
too much on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, they would not know how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
without it.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
easier by letting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and learn from their homes. It has more
Possible spelling mistake found.
postive
impacts for the development of the country.

IELTS essay Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
353 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.