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Arguments about the Design of New Cities

Arguments about the Design of New Cities BlMgw
There is a strong argument through the people that whether the desing of the buildings has to be controlled by governments or should be free from any restriction. In my opinion, a control over the design of newly contructed buildings is mandatory. On the one hand, there are several thougts to support the idea of a control over the buildings. First of all a design and construction of a modern building needs lots of complex calculations and desicions. Especially if the construction place located on an earthquake side, the regulations becomes more stricts because of the safety concerns. Some of these concerns includes which of the materials should be use to protect people in a moment of earthquake and these also covers the design. Secondly, there are several historical cities all around the world and most of them have its own architectural heritage. To protect the uniqueness of these cities there has to be a strict design rules and these rules have to be protected by the municipalities of these cities and even by the governments. On the other hand, with changing production capabilities construction is not a challanging job to done by humans anymore. However the aspects of the industry have also changed and they need more profitable buildings. With these aspects some believes that the design is not a considerable issue. Another one is the same design consideration which is forced by government transform the beautiful cities into a big gray jails. For example, in the Soviet Union almost every city look similar to each other and these cities look like a colorless concrete jungles from outside. To sum up, although there are several different opinions about the design of new buildings in nowadays cities, in my belief, there has to be some control over the design to protect the heritage and also lives of people.
There is a strong argument through the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that whether the
Possible spelling mistake found.
desing
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be controlled
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
or should be free from any restriction. In my opinion, a control over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
of
newly
Possible spelling mistake found.
contructed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
is mandatory.

On the one hand, there are several
Possible spelling mistake found.
thougts
to support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of a control over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
and construction of a modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
needs lots of complex calculations and
Possible spelling mistake found.
desicions
.
Especially
if the construction place located on an earthquake side, the regulations becomes more
Possible spelling mistake found.
stricts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the safety concerns.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of these concerns includes which of the materials should be
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
protect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in a moment of earthquake and these
also
covers the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
.
Secondly
, there are several historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
all around the world and most of them have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
architectural heritage. To protect the uniqueness of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be a strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be protected
by the municipalities of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and even by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
.

On the other hand
, with changing production capabilities construction is not a
Possible spelling mistake found.
challanging
job to done by humans anymore.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
the aspects of the industry have
also
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
changed and
they need more profitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
. With these aspects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believes that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
is not a considerable issue. Another one is the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
consideration which
is forced
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
transform the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
into a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
gray jails.
For example
, in the Soviet Union almost every city look similar to each other and these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
look like a colorless concrete
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "jungle"?
jungles
from outside.

To sum up, although there are several
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: "nowadays".
in nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, in my belief, there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
control over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
design
to protect the heritage and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
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IELTS essay Arguments about the Design of New Cities

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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