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Are there enough sports activities for young people to do in your area? Do you think it’s important for young people to do sports and exercise? Why? Write an article (about 100 words) answering these questions

Are there enough sports activities for young people to do in your area? Do you think it’s important for young people to do sports and exercise? Why? Write an article (about 100 words) answering these questions Rwr7V
As background information, I am habiting in HCMC, Vietnam in this day and age. Since HCMC is a great city with crowded popularity of roughly 10. 000. 000 people, and through researches and my own experience, there are a plenty number of sports activities organized and occurring at this instant. Several ubiquitous leisure recreations are basketball, volleyball, badminton, etcetera. Nevertheless, it is miserable to admit that juveniles have considered sports as negligible. Meanwhile, physical training can secure their salubrity by furthermore evolve their heart pump, blood circulation, lung movements, and additionally their mental health. To sum up, doing exercises and participating in physical activity is sufficient, popular and healthy to our body and my neighborhood has successfully satisfied the necessity to endure adequate fitness.
As background information, I am
Possible spelling mistake found.
habiting
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
HCMC
, Vietnam in this day and age.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
Possible spelling mistake found.
HCMC
is a great city with crowded popularity of roughly 10. 000. 000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and through researches and my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, there are a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
number of sports activities organized and occurring at this instant. Several ubiquitous leisure recreations are basketball, volleyball, badminton, etcetera.
Nevertheless
, it is miserable to admit that juveniles have considered sports as negligible. Meanwhile, physical training can secure their
Possible spelling mistake found.
salubrity
by
furthermore
evolve their heart pump, blood circulation, lung movements, and
additionally
their mental health. To sum up, doing exercises and participating in physical activity is sufficient, popular and healthy to our body and my neighborhood has
successfully
satisfied the necessity to endure adequate fitness.
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IELTS essay Are there enough sports activities for young people to do in your area? Do you think it’s important for young people to do sports and exercise? Why? Write an article (about 100 words) answering these questions

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
124 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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