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You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? aGXo
In the recent years, there has been a drastic increase in media coverage regarding private celebrity lives. While some people believe that privacy invasion is the cost of being famous others disagree and believe that media does not treat the celebrities right. In this essay, I will discuss both point of views and lend my partial support to the latter argument. Being famous comes with responsibility and the media holds people accountable. Sometimes fame gained in a very short period of time can make people feel invincible and arrogant. For instance, a famous actor in India, Salman Khan, who became popular after 3 movies at the age of seventeen, was involved in a drunk driving incident in which a few people lost their lives. The actor was released because of his influence in the industry, however, it was the media coverage which assured that the case went to tria. If there was no media to keep a check on celebrities, the power would fall more in the hands of people who are famous. On the other hand, the media has its own low points during its coverage. For instance, the accident during which Princess Diana lost her life while she was attempting to ward of photographers. Moreover, the media also seems to feed on the lowest points in a person’s life like Britney Spears’ meltdown which did not have any impact on society, but rather it was used to make a mockery of the star. Furthermore, it is also important to consider that there is a young vulnerable population reading material published by the media which in return also influences how they think and form opinions. Hence, the media needs to be more responsible about its coverage. In conclusion while the coverage of celebrity’s private life by the media can help keep celebrities in check, monetizing someone else’s sadness and mocking someone suffering from a mental health condition is inhumane. Hence, I believe that the coverage of the private life of celebrities should be more restricted and should only be published if the story can have a potentially positive impact on the society.
In the recent years, there has been a drastic increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coverage
regarding

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that privacy invasion is the cost
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
of


being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
others disagree and believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
does not treat the celebrities

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
right
. In this essay, I will discuss both point of views and lend my partial support
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
to


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
latter argument.

Being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with responsibility and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
holds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
accountable.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
fame gained in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
short period of time can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel invincible

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
arrogant.
For instance
, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actor in India, Salman Khan, who
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
became


popular after 3 movies at the age of seventeen,
was involved
in a drunk driving

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
incident
in which a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lost their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The actor
was released
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
his


influence in the industry,
however
, it was the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coverage
which assured that the

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
case
went to
Possible spelling mistake found.
tria
. If there was no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
, the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
power


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
would
fall more in the hands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
.

On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
low points during its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coverage
. For

instance, the accident during which Princess Diana lost her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
while she was

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
attempting
to ward of photographers.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
also
seems to feed on

the lowest points in a person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
like Britney Spears’ meltdown which did not have

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
any
impact on society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
rather
it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a mockery of the star.

Furthermore
, it is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to consider that there is a young vulnerable

population reading material published by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
which in return
also
influences

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
how
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and form opinions.
Hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
needs to be more responsible

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
about
its coverage.

In conclusion
while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coverage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity’s
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep


celebrities in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
, monetizing someone else’s sadness and mocking someone

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
suffering
from a mental health condition is inhumane.
Hence
, I believe that the

coverage of the private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
should be more restricted and should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
published
if the story can have a
potentially
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on the society.
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IELTS essay Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life?

Essay
  American English
26 paragraphs
353 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.