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animals keep at zoo is unethical. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

animals keep at zoo is unethical. To what extent do you agree or disagree? E30jQ
There is no doubt that keeping animals in cage is inhuman activity in this civilized era. Therefore, some people say that animals ought not to be kept at zoos for our benefits. However, I believe it is a good idea to keep animals at artificial cages as it can help to protect endangered species. ¬¬ The most important point why I agree is that zoos allow scientists to study animals and their behaviors. In other words, if wild animal is not retained at zoo, researchers would not be able to know their feeding habit and activity level. In facts, researchers could not protect endangered species which are lived in natural environment. Another important point is that zoos can give opportunity of children, in particular, enjoy learning about animals as they remained in a relatively safe and controlled space so that children can have the opportunity to interact with the animals and learn about their evolution, ecology, biodiversity and conservation. For example, I have seen my cousin, who is now 8 years, he knows lots of things about wild animals because he visited a zoo few months ago. However, many people say that animals are harshly treated at zoos as sometimes the authority of zoos does not provide sufficient amount of food and treatment. As a result, animals that live in these zoos suffer from many different kinds of disease and die earlier than others in the wild. Even if it may be true, I believe that every country has animal welfare group and they always monitor the zoos for ensuring supply of sufficient amount of wholesome, unadulterated food and treatment. In fact, zoos may provide job opportunities and play an important role in wildlife conservation In conclusion, there is no reason why animals should not keep at cages. While this helps the scientist and children to learn more about wild animals and provide a safe environment, for some people, zoos could be unfair for animals. Personally, I believe if we retain animals at artificial cages with the right attitude, we would be able to get more benefits in our life.
There is no doubt that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cage
is inhuman activity in this civilized era.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
ought not to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
at zoos for our benefits.
However
, I believe it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
at artificial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cages
as it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to protect endangered species.
Possible spelling mistake found.
¬¬


The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
point why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
is that zoos
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
scientists to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and their behaviors.
In other words
, if wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
is not retained at zoo, researchers would not be able to know their feeding habit and activity level. In facts, researchers could not protect endangered species which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in natural environment.

Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
point is that zoos can give opportunity of children,
in particular
, enjoy learning about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
as they remained in a
relatively
safe and controlled space
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that children can have the opportunity to interact with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and learn about their evolution, ecology, biodiversity and conservation.
For example
, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
my cousin, who is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
8 years, he knows lots of things about wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he visited a zoo few months ago.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
harshly
treated at zoos as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
the authority of zoos does not provide sufficient amount of food and treatment.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in these zoos suffer from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of disease and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
earlier than others in the wild. Even if it may be true, I believe that every country has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
welfare
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
group and
they always monitor the zoos for ensuring supply of sufficient amount of wholesome, unadulterated food and treatment. In fact, zoos may provide job opportunities and play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in wildlife
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
conservation


In conclusion
, there is no reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cages
. While
Did you mean "these"?
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the scientist and children to learn more about wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and provide a safe environment, for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, zoos could be unfair for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Personally
, I believe if we retain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
at artificial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cages
with the right attitude, we would be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more benefits in our life.
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IELTS essay animals keep at zoo is unethical. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
350 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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