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Many people believe that family has the strongest influence on a child’s development, while others believe that external factors such as television, friends and music play a big role. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people believe that family has the strongest influence on a child’s development, while others believe that external factors such as television, friends and music play a big role. GMBmL
Child development plays an imperative role in today's world. However, the family composition has a profound impact on the development of the personality of children, whereas the role of other factors has an intense influence on raising children simultaneously. I shall delve into both perspectives before giving my own opinion. Undeniably, juveniles learn social cohesion while rising with the outer world. However, the influential parameters of raising children can not be imagined without parents. Effecting parenting, can prevent negative behavior and promote prosocial behavior as well as values among children. Moreover, parents are considered as the first mentor so, they instill tradition, moral, ethics which helps in shaping the bright future of a child. Besides this, core family values solidify the bond with the family that helps the children develop various competencies. Therefore, children can be prevented from associating with a deviant peer. On the contrary, by staying with friends, children can avoid the feeling of desolation. The extrinsic factors such as by watching shows and programs on television children acquire more knowledge as a result, they hone their cognitive skills. Alternatively, the possibility of explicit peer pressure, aping bad habits can ruin the habits of a juvenile. Furthermore, children are likely to share their opinions with friends which can be altered in their habit of speaking or thinking by others. For instance, To conclude, although both views hold an essential role in children’s development, I opine that family is still a powerful factor in juveniles’ growth. However, other factors help to explore the children’s minds but the moral, ethics, surrounding ambiance are developing the child into a well-behaved human being.
Child development plays an imperative role in
today
's world.
However
, the
family
composition has a profound impact on the development of the personality of
children
, whereas the role of other
factors
has an intense influence on raising
children
simultaneously
. I shall delve into both perspectives
before
giving my
own
opinion.

Undeniably
, juveniles learn social cohesion while rising with the outer world.
However
, the influential parameters of raising
children
can not
be imagined
without parents. Effecting parenting, can
prevent
negative
behavior and promote prosocial behavior
as well
as values among
children
.
Moreover
, parents
are considered
as the
first
mentor
so
, they instill tradition, moral, ethics which
helps
in shaping the bright future of a child.
Besides
this, core
family
values solidify the bond with the
family
that
helps
the
children
develop various competencies.
Therefore
,
children
can be
prevented
from associating with a deviant peer.

On the contrary
, by staying with friends,
children
can avoid the feeling of desolation. The extrinsic
factors
such as by watching
shows
and programs on television
children
acquire more knowledge
as a result
, they hone their cognitive
skills
.
Alternatively
, the possibility of explicit peer pressure, aping
bad
habits can ruin the habits of a juvenile.
Furthermore
,
children
are likely to share their opinions with friends which can
be altered
in their habit of speaking or thinking by others.
For instance
,

To conclude
, although both views hold an essential role in
children’s
development, I opine that
family
is
still
a powerful
factor
in juveniles’ growth.
However
, other
factors
help
to explore the
children’s
minds
but
the moral, ethics, surrounding ambiance are developing the child into a well-behaved human being.
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IELTS essay Many people believe that family has the strongest influence on a child’s development, while others believe that external factors such as television, friends and music play a big role.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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