Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

An increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve appearance.why do people want to choose it and it is a negative or positive development.

An increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve appearance. why do people want to choose it and it is a negative or positive development. DaqXm
The trend of preferring cosmetic surgery has been inclined amongst people to bring improvement in personality. According to my perception, this is a negative development This essay shed-light on reason and its negative influence. To commence with, people select cosmetic surgeries due to having more preference of good looking in each and every field. The reason for this is nowadays personality is being identified by higher authorities during the selection of new employee. This can be said that effective appearance is equal important as qualifications on a workplace Therefore, having importance of gorgeous look has been increasing the tendency of people towards taking these medical treatments. For example, had one of my friends not taken plastic surgery owing to having face problems from incident, he would not have been selected by world's famous company. I believe that this has a adverse effect on people's health. As numerous health issues have been faced by people. This is because after applying different kinds of chemical on skin, either people get allergies from them, or can be prone to henious ailments such as skin cancer. Hence, these methods can be assumed wrong for skin. For example, one survey was conducted by health department last year in India, that displays 70%of people have been facing health problems, due to these surgeries. To conclude, after giving viewpoints it is crystal clear that people prefer to medical treatments in order to enhance look because great looking have significance in each and every areas. Nevertheless, this has detrimental effect on people's body.
The trend of preferring cosmetic surgery has
been inclined
amongst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to bring improvement in personality. According to my perception, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development This essay shed-light on reason and its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
influence.

To commence with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
select cosmetic surgeries due to having more preference of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
good looking
in each and every field.
The reason for this is
nowadays personality is
being identified
by higher authorities during the selection of new employee. This can
be said
that effective appearance is equal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as qualifications on a workplace
Therefore
, having importance of gorgeous look has been increasing the tendency of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
towards taking these medical treatments.
For example
, had one of my friends not taken plastic surgery owing to having face problems from incident, he would not have
been selected
by world's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

I believe that this has
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
adverse effect on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues have
been faced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
after applying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of chemical on skin, either
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
allergies from them, or can be prone to
Possible spelling mistake found.
henious
ailments such as skin cancer.
Hence
, these methods can
be assumed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
for skin.
For example
, one survey
was conducted
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
department last year in India, that displays 70%of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have been facing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems, due to these surgeries.

To conclude
, after giving viewpoints it is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to medical treatments in order to enhance look
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
great looking have significance in each and every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "area"?
areas
.
Nevertheless
, this has detrimental effect on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's body.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay An increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve appearance. why do people want to choose it and it is a negative or positive development.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • An increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve appearance.why do people want to choose it and it is a negative or positive development.