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An increasing number of people change their career during their work life . What are the reasons of this . Reasons and positive or negative.n

Nowadays, the majority of multitudes during work life change their career. Despite, I think there are less adverse impact on human's life instead of beneficial effect. This essay I will discuss a number of reasons as well numerous beneficial effect in upcoming paragraphs. Discussing the first reason, why people change their career? In these days, a number of individuals are migrated from urban areas in light of the fact that they have face plethora of hurdles owing to job occupations and passions. On the light of fact that, if they do not achieve their goals and in addition, a number of times they have don't interest in their jobs. Without any doubt, numerous times a plethora companies gave highly paid. What's more, people work in a companies or factories that time their managers are not honest and sometimes they give less salary to employees. Consequently, it is the best reasons which masses change their passions. Nevertheless, there are some positive effects. First and foremost reason is that, if masses change their life goals when they will hope that undoubtedly they achieve better as compared to previous sucess. Moreover, With the assist of change their passions because they have interest in other field. For instance, not I but also myriad of people which have not interest in computer field. Definitely, they change their passions such as they have interest in engineers field than they show their talent and make the fright future.
Nowadays, the majority of multitudes during work life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their career. Despite, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there are less adverse impact on human's life
instead
of beneficial effect. This essay I will discuss a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
as well
numerous beneficial effect in upcoming paragraphs.

Discussing the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their career? In these days, a number of individuals
are migrated
from urban areas in light of the fact that they have face plethora of hurdles owing to job occupations and passions. On the light of fact that, if they do not achieve their goals and
in addition
, a number of times they have don't
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in their jobs. Without any doubt, numerous times a plethora
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
gave
highly
paid. What's more,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
work in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
or factories that time their managers are not honest and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they give less salary to employees.
Consequently
, it is the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
which masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their passions.

Nevertheless
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects.
First
and foremost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that, if masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
goals when they will hope that
undoubtedly
they achieve better as compared to previous
Possible spelling mistake found.
sucess
.
Moreover
, With the assist of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their passions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in other field.
For instance
, not I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
myriad of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
which have not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in computer field. Definitely, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their passions such as they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in engineers field than they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their talent and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the fright future.

IELTS essay An increasing number of people change their career during their work life. What are the reasons of this. Reasons and positive or negative. n

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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