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An increasing number of people are buying what they need online what are the advantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online?

An increasing number of people are buying what they need online what are the advantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online? BV1w
Online shopping shows a great progress in terms of selling goods online. In this modern world everyone possess an android phone which helps them to buy things online. I strongly believe that online shopping has more advantages. We can find out wide range of products. We can choose to buy them on our necessity. Flexibility to reach various e- commerce websites so that we can cross check the product cost, it helps us to find the product with low price. One of the greatest advantage we can relate it to present situations is covid pandemic. We can avoid going out which is the major concern now-a-days. When it comes to physical shopping we have to touch things and also we have to interact with different people which is the main reason for covid expansion. Time constraint is one of the factor in this busy lives. Aged people can buy their needs instead of going out. When it comes to disadvantages fraudulent is the main problem. Also we cannot determine the product quality. People who have difficulty in utilising this business technology especially in rural areas are effecting the most. Because most of the products Will be available online so that small scale industries like handicrafts, weavers are losing their income. So online shopping is beneficial in its own way. Also it has some disadvants we can find solutions in future. It has wide reach so that we can buy products all over the world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "great progress".
a great progress
in terms of selling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. In this modern world everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "possesses", "possessed".
possess
an android phone which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
has more advantages. We can find out wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. We can choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
them on our necessity. Flexibility to reach various e- commerce websites
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can cross
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
cost, it
In informal texts, 'to' is not necessary. Do you mean "helps us find"?
helps us to find
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
with low price. One of the greatest advantage we can relate it to present situations is
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
pandemic. We can avoid going out which is the major concern
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
-a-days. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
touch things and
also
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
interact with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
which is the main reason for
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
expansion. Time constraint is one of the factor in this busy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Aged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
their needs
instead
of going out.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to disadvantages fraudulent is the main problem.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
we cannot determine the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
quality.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who have difficulty in
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilising' is British English.
utilising
this business technology
especially
in rural areas are effecting the most.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
Will be available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale industries like handicrafts, weavers are losing their income.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is beneficial in its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
disadvants
we can find solutions
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. It has wide reach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
all over the world.
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IELTS essay An increasing number of people are buying what they need online what are the advantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
244 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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