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An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centres rather than smaller, more traditional shops? v.3

An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centres rather than smaller, more traditional shops? v. 3
There are arguments to suggest that a rising number of commercial establishments such as malls and supermarket have resulted in a decrease in the number of small-scale business stores. There are several positive outcomes behind this trend and a considerable number of potential drawbacks. Primarily, it could be argued that in some large scale commercial establishments, there are a variety of selections about personal commodities such as clothing, shoes, and bags. There is a view that well-developed shops have to increase the supply of their products because some small commercial establishment cannot provide the entire goods to the public. Taking into consideration the local store which has a limited supply of personal goods in a remote area, it seems apparent that some store owners have paucity in the investment of commercial goods, thus they cannot maximise the supply and demand of their business. Furthermore, it is often claimed that there is an amenable price in some more affluent shopping centres that some developing merchandises. Many people consider that there is an additional cost for some products available in the local store due to some owners who procure the supply of their shop to other large distributors of goods. For instance, the store keeper will gain a higher profitable income if they obtain some products to some higher commercial distributors, which sell cheap consumer goods. As a result, there will be an advantage for local store keepers. In contrast, it can never be denied that there are negative effects of opting to large shops. Firstly, there is a strong argument that the location of these establishments is often located at the city centre thereby it would be a burden for those people who live in a rural place to purchase their personal goods. Secondly, it is often claimed that in some local stores, there are reasons to suggest that there are residents who have developed relationship with some store keeper, therefore it might be the case that the customer could ask a favorable grant to some small stores such as lending a market good and paying it at a definite time. In my opinion, a variety of selection in large shops could make the customers confused on which items will be the best. Moreover, it is debatable that those products with low price are the ones which are outdated and leftover of the previous peak sale. To conclude, there are favourable outcomes of choosing large commercial centre. However, it is indubitable that the positives are outweighed by the negative outcomes.
There are arguments to suggest that a rising number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
establishments
such as malls and supermarket have resulted in a decrease in the number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
-scale business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
. There are several
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes behind this trend and a considerable number of potential drawbacks.

Primarily
, it could
be argued
that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
establishments
, there are a variety of selections about personal commodities such as clothing, shoes, and bags. There is a view that well-developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
supply
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
establishment
cannot provide the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
to the public. Taking into consideration the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
which has a limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
supply
of personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
in a remote area, it seems apparent that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
owners have paucity in the investment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
,
thus
they cannot
Possible spelling mistake. 'maximise' is British English.
maximise
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
supply
and demand of their business.
Furthermore
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
claimed that there is an amenable price in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
more affluent shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
developing merchandises.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider that there is an additional cost for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
available in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
owners who procure the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
supply
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
distributors of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
.
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
keeper will gain a higher profitable income if they obtain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
distributors, which sell
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
.
As a result
, there will be an advantage for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
keepers.

In contrast
, it can never
be denied
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of opting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
Firstly
, there is a strong argument that the location of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
establishments
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
located at the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
thereby it would be a burden for those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a rural place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
their personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
.
Secondly
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
claimed that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
, there are reasons to suggest that there are residents who have developed relationship with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
keeper,
therefore
it might be the case that the customer could ask a favorable grant to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
such as lending a market
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
and paying it at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
time.

In my opinion, a variety of selection in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the customers confused on which items will be the best.
Moreover
, it is debatable that those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
with low price are the ones which
are outdated
and leftover of the previous peak sale.

To conclude
, there are
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
outcomes of choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commercial
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.
However
, it is indubitable that the positives
are outweighed
by the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcomes.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay An increasing number of larger shopping areas, malls and department stores are leading to the decline of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping in larger shopping centres rather than smaller, more traditional shops? v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
419 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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